Higher education seems to have been universalized as more and more people have the chance to pursue it. While some welcome this emerging change, others raise concerns over some unexpected consequences. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

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Nowadays, pre-graduate studies are tremendously popular in many countries , with a great opportunity.
This
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increasing alternation is warmly welcomed by many individuals ,
while
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it is not accepted by others. In
this
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essay, I will describe the benefits and drawbacks of
this
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education concept,
as well as
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my point of view on studies.
On the other hand
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, there are some advantages in pursuing higher education
due to
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the fact that it can help equality and growth in society. In
this
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competitive world,
for instance
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, a lot of young people have to seek jobs in a difficult way, which proves that their advanced qualifications are required for a safer career path.
Hence
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, more degree holders can only fulfil the development of organisations, and
in addition
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, they can earn an equal income and spend similar household expenses.
On the other hand
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, there is a drawback to being more educated in many countries because it is costly and limited in terms of better quality.
For example
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,
although
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there are some scholarship programs in developed countries like Japan, many Asian students are still facing the financial crisis of debt for their monthly expenditures.
Therefore
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, people from only rich families can study
further
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education without any problems.
Consequently
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, it should provide more affordable, reliable, and practical internship courses in many schools so that youth will be ready to work with full confidence in local or international organisations. In my opinion, study should be open for every learner with clearer aims, fair costs, and good quality since an educated person is a vital part in building a sophisticated environment.

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task response
Answer both sides more clearly. You talk about good and bad points, but the bad side is short and not fully explained.
task response
Give your own opinion in a clear way from the start and keep it through the essay.
task response
Use examples that fit the main idea more closely. Some ideas are too general.
coherence and cohesion
Make one clear plan: intro, one paragraph for each side, then your opinion.
coherence and cohesion
Do not start two body paragraphs with the same link words. 'On the other hand' is used two times, and one time it should be 'On the one hand'.
coherence and cohesion
Connect ideas inside each paragraph more smoothly. Some sentences jump too fast from one point to another.
coherence and cohesion
You have a clear introduction and a clear ending.
task response
You try to discuss both views and add your opinion.
task response
You use one example to support your point.
Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • education
  • study
  • job
  • work
  • money
  • cost
  • debt
  • advantage
  • disadvantage
  • problem
  • solution
  • idea
  • change
  • grow
  • skill
  • learn
  • plan
  • access
  • quality
  • equality
  • policy
  • life
  • future
  • view
  • discuss
  • balance
  • practical
  • theory
  • guide
  • support
  • open
  • afford
  • training
  • opportunity
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