IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7.5

Economic development in the countryside has improved the quality of life in urban areas more than in the countryside. This creates a gap. What problems does this cause, and how might these problems be reduced?

✍️ Want to check your own essay?Get started →
In contemporary society, the development of economy in nations has improved the quality of life in urban areas more than in the rural areas.
This
Linking Words
 could raise issue in the
overall
Linking Words
 development of the country and reduce the economy;
however
Linking Words
,
this
Linking Words
 can be solved by allocating massive reserves and utilising the technological advancements to improve the standard of living in the countryside.
This
Linking Words
 essay will discuss the reasons that creates the gap and provide viable solutions to mitigate it. The primary catalyst of
this
Linking Words
 rising issue is
due to
Linking Words
 political and educational deficiencies. Many individuals living in villages remain unaware of the governance system and their constitutional rights.
Additionally
Linking Words
,
due to
Linking Words
 widespread financial instability, parents often cannot afford to educate their children. The funds provided by the government are frequently insufficient to build the infrastructure necessary for quality education and improvement.
For instance
Linking Words
, a recent survey conducted in India revealed that a significant number of rural children do not attend schools regularly
due to
Linking Words
 poor infrastructure and poverty.
As a result
Linking Words
, these citizens remain excluded from official welfare schemes and legal protections. To mitigate
this
Linking Words
 growing problem, the government must enforce strict rules and regulations on the officials to fulfil the allotted work.
Additionally
Linking Words
, by providing huge finances to build modern school facilities, integrate technology, upgrade healthcare systems and construct better transport networks, the standard of living of can be enhanced. Monthly awareness campaigns regarding healthcare, financial literacy, and education are essential.
Consequently
Linking Words
, improving rural lives will directly boost a nation’s
overall
Linking Words
 economy and progression. In conclusion,
although
Linking Words
 there is a severe gap between the rural and urban areas
due to
Linking Words
 less funds and unawareness,
this
Linking Words
 can be resolved. By implementing awareness campaigns, allocating massive capital and improving the infrastructure, governments can successfully bridge
this
Linking Words
 divide and ensure balanced national growth.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task response
Answer both parts more clearly. Say the problems in one full part, then say the solutions in another full part.
task response
Give more direct problems of the gap, like people moving to cities, weak farm work, and less equal chances.
task response
Explain each main idea a little more. Some ideas are good, but they need one more step of detail.
coherence and cohesion
Use linking words with care. Some are good, but a few ideas move too fast from one point to the next.
coherence and cohesion
Keep one clear main idea in each paragraph. This will make the essay easier to follow.
coherence and cohesion
Check small grammar and word choice problems because they can make the meaning less clear.
coherence and cohesion
You have a clear introduction and a clear ending.
coherence and cohesion
The essay has a logical order: problem first, then solution.
task response
You answer the topic and give ways to reduce the problem.
task response
You use an example about India, and this helps support your ideas.
Structure your answers in logical paragraphs

The easiest way to score well on the IELTS Task 2 writing portion is to structure your writing in a solid essay format.

A strong argument essay structure can be split up into 4 paragraphs, each containing 4 sentences (except the conclusion paragraph, which only contains 3 sentences).

Stick to this essay structure:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: