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Writing Samples
Band 5.5

Some people believe that studying at college or university is important for a successful career. Others think that it is better to leave school and find work to gain experience for a successful professional life. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

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Building a successful career is a top priority for many people today. Some believe that studying at a college or university is essential to achieve
this
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,
while
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 others argue that entering the workforce early to gain hands-on
experience
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 is a better route. Both views have their strengths, which I will discuss before sharing my opinion. On one hand, formal education offers valuable skills and credentials, particularly in
specialized
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specialised
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 fields like medicine, engineering, and law. A university environment fosters critical thinking, problem-solving abilities, and expertise, which are crucial for complex professions.
Additionally
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, degrees can provide a competitive edge, as many high-paying jobs require formal qualifications. Beyond knowledge, students gain networking opportunities and internships that contribute to professional growth.
Conversely
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, others argue that practical
experience
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 is equally, if not more, valuable in certain industries. By starting work early, individuals can gain real-world skills, build professional relationships, and earn income sooner. For fields like technology and business, hands-on
experience
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 is often
prioritized
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prioritised
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 by employers, who value efficient problem-solving and industry knowledge over theoretical learning. Many successful professionals have thrived without degrees by developing skills directly in the workplace. In my view, a balanced approach is ideal.
While
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 formal education provides a solid foundation, work
experience
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 offers practical insights and adaptability. Combining both,
such
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 as through internships or apprenticeships, may offer the most effective path to career success.

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Task response
Score: 8. To reach 9, add one or two more real examples. For example, say why a doctor must study first, but a person in sales may learn well by working.
Task response
Your final view is good, but it is short. Say more clearly when study should come first and when work should come first.
Coherence and cohesion
Score: 8. The order is very clear. To improve, link each main point more closely to the next one. For example, end the first body part by saying that this is not true for every kind of job.
Coherence and cohesion
Some ideas could be built out more. In the work paragraph, explain how early work can help a person move up in a job over time.
Task response
You discuss both sides and give your own view. Your main ideas are clear and stay on the topic.
Task response
The points about jobs that need a degree, and jobs where work skills matter more, are strong and useful.
Coherence and cohesion
Your essay has a clear shape: start, one side, the other side, and your view at the end.
Coherence and cohesion
Linking words such as “On one hand”, “Conversely”, and “In my view” help the reader follow your ideas.
Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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