The pie charts below show the devices people in the 18 to 25 age group use to watch television in Canada in two different years.

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The pie chart below illustrates the devices people use to watch TV in Canada.
Overall
Linking Words
, it shows that in
2009
Punctuation problem
2009,
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most people
use
Wrong verb form
used
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conventional TV by 34 per
cent
Use synonyms
.
While
Linking Words
,
Punctuation problem
apply
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in 2019 most individuals use flat-screen
TV
Check wording
TVs
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,
however
Linking Words
, from 2009 to 2019 tablet has increased by 14 per
cent
Use synonyms
,
on the other
Linking Words
hand
Punctuation problem
hand,
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laptop has dropped by 8 per
cent
Use synonyms
. Mobile phone had
also
Linking Words
increased by 11 per
cent
Use synonyms
.

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Vocabulary: Replace the words cent with synonyms.
Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "undefined" in your introduction.
Vocabulary: Only 4 basic words for charts were used.
Vocabulary: The word "increased" was used 2 times.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • pie charts
  • 18 to 25 age group
  • devices
  • watch television
  • Canada
  • comparison
  • shift
  • preferences
  • mobile devices
  • traditional televisions
  • technological advancements
  • television viewing habits
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