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Writing Samples
Band 6.5

Some people believe that online classes are more beneficial for schoolchildren, while others think that traditional classroom teaching is better. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

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The importance of online and traditional
education
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 has always been debatable and has now become more controversial, with many people claiming that online classes are beneficial,
while
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 others support traditional classroom teaching. The substantial influence of technology on
education
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 has sparked considerable debate in recent years. In my opinion, the former view appears to be more beneficial.
This
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 essay will
further
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 elaborate on both perspectives before reaching a logical conclusion. There are several reasons that support online learning, but the most important one stems from the fact that
students
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 can access a wide range of study materials.
This
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 is beneficial because many educational websites regularly update their content
according to
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 current developments. Another pivotal aspect is that online
education
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 can be more affordable, as
students
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 can access digital resources without purchasing numerous books. Needless to say, these advantages make online learning a convenient option for many
students
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.
However
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, there are some drawbacks to online learning that support the argument for traditional classroom teaching. One of the most significant is that
students
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 can easily become distracted
while
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 using computers or mobile devices. Traditional classrooms provide a more disciplined environment where teachers can directly monitor
students
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 and answer their questions. Basically, face-to-face learning
also
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 allows
students
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 to communicate with their classmates, which can improve their social and communication skills.
Hence
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, it is apparent why many people favour traditional classroom
education
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.
According to
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 the arguments mentioned above, one can reach the conclusion that both methods have considerable benefits.
Nevertheless
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, I believe that online learning is more advantageous because of its accessibility, affordability, and availability of updated educational resources.

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Task response
Score: 7. Your answer covers all parts of the task, but the ideas need more detail. Add one clear real-life example for each side. For example, a child in a small town may use online lessons when there is no good school near home.
Task response
Explain why your points matter for schoolchildren. For example, say how less cost can help families, or how class talk can help shy children make friends.
Task response
Your own view is clear, but it is a little too simple. Say why the good points of online learning are more important than the good points of classroom learning.
Coherence and cohesion
Score: 7. Your paragraphs are clear, but some parts use too many set phrases, such as “Needless to say”, “Basically”, and “According to the arguments mentioned above”. Use short, direct sentences instead.
Coherence and cohesion
Make the link between ideas more natural. After saying students may get distracted online, explain how this can hurt learning before moving to the next point.
Coherence and cohesion
Use the same words for the two sides more often. For example, use “online classes” and “classroom lessons” throughout, instead of changing to many similar terms.
Task response
You discuss both online learning and classroom teaching, and you give a clear view: online learning is better.
Task response
Your main ideas are on topic, such as low cost, more study materials, focus, and talking with classmates.
Coherence and cohesion
The essay has a clear four-part shape: opening, online learning, classroom teaching, and ending.
Coherence and cohesion
Linking words such as “However”, “Another”, “Hence”, and “Nevertheless” help the reader follow your ideas.
Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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