IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 8.5

You live in an area where the nearest bus stop is quite far from your neighbourhood. You think a new bus stop should be introduced closer to where you live. Write a letter to the local transport authority. In your letter: explain the problems caused by the current location of the bus stop suggest where the new bus stop should be located explain how the new bus stop would benefit local residents

✍️ Want to check your own essay?Write on this topic →
Dear Sir or Madam, I am writing to request the installation of a new bus stop in my neighbourhood, as the existing one is located a considerable distance from the main residential area. Currently, residents have to walk approximately twenty minutes to reach the nearest bus stop.
This
Linking Words
 is particularly inconvenient for elderly people, schoolchildren and those who rely heavily on public transportation for their daily commute.
Moreover
Linking Words
, during the winter months, walking
such
Linking Words
 a long distance in extremely cold weather can be difficult and uncomfortable. I would suggest installing a new bus stop near the community centre on King Street.
This
Linking Words
 location is not only easily accessible to residents but
also
Linking Words
 close to several apartment buildings, a school and a shopping centre.
Therefore
Linking Words
, it would be convenient for a large number of passengers. Introducing
this
Linking Words
 facility would significantly improve transportation in our neighbourhood. It would reduce walking and commuting time, thereby encouraging more residents to use public transportation
instead
Linking Words
 of private vehicles.
As a result
Linking Words
,
this
Linking Words
 could
also
Linking Words
 help reduce local traffic congestion and vehicle emissions. I would appreciate it if you could consider
this
Linking Words
 request.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task response
Add one or two more local details. For example, say how many people live near King Street or why the community centre is a safe place for a bus stop.
task response
Make the ending a little more formal by adding a closing line, such as “Yours faithfully,” followed by your name.
coherence and cohesion
The ideas are well ordered. To make the link even smoother, connect the new stop to the last point: it would help people reach the school, shops, and homes more easily.
coherence and cohesion
Use a wider range of simple link words, such as “also”, “because”, and “for this reason”, but do not use too many in one paragraph.
task response
You cover all three parts of the letter. You explain the problem, give a clear place for the new stop, and show how it can help local people.
coherence and cohesion
Your letter is easy to follow. Each main idea has its own paragraph, and linking words such as “Moreover”, “Therefore”, and “As a result” help the reader.
The Closing

The style of the letter determine how you have to close it.

Check out the suggested closing sentences for each type of letter in the General IELTS Test. The closing sentence should be the last sentence of your letter.

Formal style (To someone you have not met, whose name you don’t know)

  • Yours faithfully,

Semi-formal (To someone you may or may not have met, whose last name you know)

  • Yours sincerely,

Informal (To someone you know well, whose first name you know and use)

  • Best regards,
  • Warm wishes,

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: