The chart below shows information about changes in the revenue of 5 toothpaste manufacturers in 2000 and 2005 compared with the revenue in 1995.

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This
Linking Words
bar graph shows information about the revenue of five different
toothpase
Correct your spelling
toothpaste
manufacturers. In
this
Linking Words
graph
Add a comma
graph,
show examples
the revenue is compared between 1995, 2000 and 2005.
This
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bar graph indicates that in
2000
Punctuation problem
2000,
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three different brands actually had a significant loss in income
,
Punctuation problem
;
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only Sensodyne and Aquafresh could improove there gains a little bit.
On the other hand
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, in
2005
Punctuation problem
2005,
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there was only one toothpaste company that had a loss
which
Punctuation problem
, which
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was Crest. All the other producers could show that they have made more revenue and
increase
Wrong verb form
increased
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their sales. What stands out
in particular
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,
Punctuation problem
apply
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is that out of the five big
players
Add a comma
players,
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Aquafress could change its balance sheet and came back from a loss five years ago
and
Punctuation problem
, and
show examples
now the reached the biggest growth. In conclusion,
this
Linking Words
chart shows that there are only two brands that have no losses
and
Punctuation problem
, and
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these are Sensodyne and Aquafresh.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, Close
up
Capitalize the proper name
Up
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is the one company with the biggest financial gain in 2025 and
therefore
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has grown
most
Correct article usage
the most
show examples
.

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "on the other hand".
Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "shows" in your introduction.
Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "information" in your introduction.
Vocabulary: The word "graph" was used 3 times.
Vocabulary: The word "shows" was used 3 times.
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