The number of older people is increasing. Some people think this is causing problems in their countries while others feel that older people play an important role in society. Discuss both views and give your opinion

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Introduction

Nowadays,

The

Fix capitalization

the

show examples

number of older people is increasing and has become an increasingly significant issue ,

while

Linking Words

some people think that the number of older people is not increasing , I strongly believe that it's pretty right that the number of the

older's

Check wording

older

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community is increasing.

This

Linking Words

essay will discuss the main reasons for

this

Linking Words

viewpoint.

Body paragraph 1

One of the man reason is that

causing

Wrong verb form

it causes

show examples

a problem,

this

Linking Words

is mainly because

Punctuation problem

apply

show examples

societites we need

younger

Correct article usage

a younger

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crowd to contribute to development in our world .

In other words

Linking Words

, they really are more passion more in

life

Use synonyms

for

Linking Words

example

Punctuation problem

example,

show examples

ISEF

they are

Correct subject-verb agreement

show examples

a group of younger folk

Punctuation problem

apply

show examples

who

Correct subject-verb agreement

apply

show examples

participate in

this

Linking Words

event

Punctuation problem

show examples

As a result

Linking Words

, their mind thinking is helping

world

Verb problem

solve world

show examples

problem

Check wording

problems

show examples

Body paragraph 2

Another important factor is that older

play

Check wording

people play

show examples

an important role in

life

Use synonyms

this

Linking Words

is mainly because in our society older communities

has

Correct subject-verb agreement

have

show examples

their own respect and place .

In other words

Linking Words

the

Correct pronoun usage

they

show examples

are really great leaders and wise for the experience in

life

Use synonyms

for instance

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, parents who can play a really good role to lead the families.

Therefore

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, the world can learn more from them .

Conclusion

In conclusion,

although

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there are different points of

veiw

Correct your spelling

view

this

Linking Words

issue ,

Fix capitalization

show examples

strongly believe that

Punctuation problem

apply

show examples

they

all

Verb problem

are all

show examples

right , because everyone

see

Correct subject-verb agreement

sees

show examples

Change preposition

from

show examples

different angles

Punctuation problem

. This

show examples

this

Linking Words

is mainly because there clear minds and

for the

Change preposition

apply

show examples

experience in

life

Use synonyms

yonsfahad00

Aug 24, 2026

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task response

Discuss both views more fully. Explain clearly why a growing old group may cause problems, such as more need for health care and less work force. Then explain why old people are important, such as giving care, help, and life knowledge.

task response

Give a clear opinion in the first paragraph and keep it the same in the end. Your end says both views are right, but it does not clearly say which view you support more.

task response

Use examples that directly fit your point. The ISEF example is not clear and does not show why more old people cause a problem. A simple example about workers, tax, or hospitals would work better.

coherence and cohesion

Use a simple four-part plan: introduction, problems of an older group, value of old people, and conclusion. Each body paragraph should have one main idea.

coherence and cohesion

Make the link between ideas clear. For example: “One problem is a lack of young workers.” Then explain it and give one example. Do not move too fast from young people to an event.

coherence and cohesion

Use link words with care: “However”, “For example”, “As a result”, and “In conclusion”. Do not repeat “this is mainly because” in every paragraph.

coherence and cohesion

Check full stops and spaces around commas. Short, clear sentences will make your ideas easier to follow.

task response

You tried to include both sides of the topic: possible problems and the good role of old people.

task response

You gave your own view and tried to support it with reasons.

coherence and cohesion

Your essay has an introduction, two main paragraphs, and a conclusion.

coherence and cohesion

You use some useful linking words, such as “For example”, “In other words”, and “Therefore”.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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8
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
23
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

<4

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

239 words

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The number of older people is increasing. Some people think this is causing problems in their countries while others feel that older people play an important role in society. Discuss both views and give your opinion

People aim to achieve a balance between their work and personal life, but few people achieve it. What are the causes of the problem? How to overcome it?

As a country develops, people tend to buy more cars. Do the advantages for the individual outweigh the disadvantages for the environment?

In the past, acquiring knowledge was only possible through books. But nowadays through the internet. Do you think advantages outweigh disadvantages?

Some people claim that all experimentation an animal is bad and should be outlawed.However,others believe that important scientific discoveries can be made from animal experiments. Can experimentation on animals be justified? Are there any alternatives?

In many countries, the age of the criminal is getting lower. Give the reasons for and solutions to the problem. Support your position with relevant examples.