IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 3.5

Universities are becoming increasingly expensive to operate. In some countries, money from taxation has met these costs. However, this is not always enough to maintain the quality of universities. What problems can occur when universities do not have enough money? Suggest alternative ways that universities can be funded.

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Introduction
The cost to maintain
universities
Use synonyms
 and their quality
have
Correct subject-verb agreement
has
show examples
 risen steadily. We can see differents way to support it around the world. The problems and solutions about
this
Linking Words
 topic are a considerable debate. In
this
Linking Words
 essay, I will explain the main
issuies
Correct your spelling
issues
, inequality and less investigation.
Also
Linking Words
, I will suggest finding from public taxes
,
Punctuation problem
apply
show examples
 and private
contribution
Check wording
contributions
show examples
.
Body paragraph 1
The main problem is that it may lead low quality of
education
Use synonyms
. If
universities
Use synonyms
 should reduce their bills, they will decrease the number of
schoolarships
Correct your spelling
scholarships
.
As a result
Linking Words
,
lack
Correct article usage
a lack
show examples
 of
invest
Replace the word
investment
 in
universities
Use synonyms
 leave student from vulnerable
background
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backgrounds
show examples
 out of professional
education
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.
For example
Linking Words
, we can see countries with
low
Correct article usage
a low
show examples
 budget to support
education
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, generally in
goverment
Correct your spelling
governments
 with less economic development, where
education
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into
Change preposition
apply
show examples
universities
Use synonyms
 in a privilege only
a
Change preposition
for a
show examples
 few families. Addittionaly
education
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 institutions have a
responsability
Correct your spelling
responsibility
 to invest in
innovation
Replace the word
innovative
 technologies and scientific
researchs
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research
show examples
, which they will not
able
Verb problem
be able
show examples
 to do if they do not have enough monetary funds.
Body paragraph 2
On the other hand
Linking Words
, the solutions that I could suggest
is
Correct subject-verb agreement
are
show examples
 that goverment would
increse de
Correct your spelling
increase the
 taxes to biggest companies.
For instance
Linking Words
, in
Brazil
Add a comma
Brazil,
show examples
 the car factories,
technologie
Correct your spelling
technology
 companies and the mining sector should pay more taxes every month, which go directly to
education
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.
Conclusion
In conclusion,
education
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 is essencial point everywhere,
universities
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 not only give a
carrer
Correct your spelling
career
, but they
also
Linking Words
 make innovation scientific and
technologica
Correct your spelling
technological
,
consequently
Linking Words
 government and
private
Correct article usage
the private
show examples
 sector should guarantee equality and
higth level
Correct your spelling
high-level
education
Use synonyms
.

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task response
Answer both parts in the same depth. You explain the problems well, but give only one main way to get more money. Add other ways, such as fees based on family income, help from old students, gifts from firms, or money from research work.
task response
Make each problem more clear. Explain how less money can lead to fewer teachers, old books and labs, less research, and fewer places for poor students.
task response
Develop the tax idea. Say why large firms should pay more, how the money can be used, and why this would help schools and students.
task response
Use examples that clearly support your point. The Brazil example is useful, but explain what money would go to, such as labs, grants, or teacher pay.
coherence and cohesion
Your essay has a clear start, body, and end. Make the plan even clearer: use one body part for problems and one body part for ways to fund schools.
coherence and cohesion
Begin body parts with direct main ideas. For example: “A lack of money can harm both students and research.” Then give two linked details.
coherence and cohesion
Use simple link words with care: “First”, “Also”, “As a result”, “For example”, and “Therefore”. This will help the reader follow each step.
coherence and cohesion
Avoid ideas that are not fully linked. The first body part moves from school grants to research very fast. Add a short link to show that both are results of low funding.
coherence and cohesion
Make the last paragraph sum up the main problems and all funding ideas. Do not add a new point there.
task response
You address the two key problems: poor students may lose access, and schools may have less money for new work and research.
task response
You give a real-world example and a clear idea about higher taxes for large firms.
coherence and cohesion
The essay has an introduction, two main body parts, and a conclusion.
coherence and cohesion
You use some helpful links, such as “As a result”, “For example”, and “In conclusion”.
Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • academic standards
  • research facilities
  • innovation
  • tuition fees
  • socio-economic backgrounds
  • staff retention
  • extracurricular activities
  • private investments
  • sponsorship
  • alumni donations
  • government grants
  • subsidies
  • commercial activities
  • distance learning
  • online learning
  • revenue streams
  • endowment funds
  • capital campaign
  • cost-cutting measures
  • scholarships
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