The chart below illustrates the rates of hospitalisation of five medical centres in a European country between 2004 and 2018

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The chart below illustrates the rates of hospitalisation of five medical centres in a European country between 2004 and 2018
IELTS Writing Task Chart for The chart below illustrates the rates of hospitalisation of five medical centres in a European country between 2004 and 2018
The chart below illustrates the rates of hospitalisation of five medical centres in a European country between 2004 and 2018 Looking at the
overall
Linking Words
structure , it is readily
apperant
Correct your spelling
apparent
that 4 countries of hospitals experienced an increase in inpatient admissions over the entire
period
Punctuation problem
period,
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whereas
Linking Words
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
Adlin city experienced a decrase with the exception of one.The highest in the initial period
the
Punctuation problem
, the
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most widely preferred one was Adlin city ,
while
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Oxley recorded the lowest figure. Looking at the statistics in more detail, an upward trend of
hospitilasation
Correct your spelling
hospitalisation
had
noted
Verb problem
been noted
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in Badley city.In
Correct article usage
the
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initial period
began
Punctuation problem
,
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200
patient
Fix the agreement mistake
patients
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experienced an increase to 255
the
Change preposition
over the
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next 8
years
Use synonyms
,
Punctuation problem
;
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however
Linking Words
slightly decreased from 2012 to 2014 ,before rising significantly from 200 to 270
Use synonyms
P
Correct your spelling
patients
by 2018
On the other hand
Linking Words
, the rate of patient admissions
approximately had stabilied
Correct word order
had approximately stabilised
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in Stanton and Fortsmith cities.in Fortsmith, indications started 170
p
Use synonyms
in 2004,but over
Use synonyms
years
Correct article usage
the years
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had
went
Wrong verb form
gone
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up 205
p
Use synonyms
from 2004 to 2010,
whereas
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diminished 195
p
Use synonyms
the next 2
years
Use synonyms
and ,
then
Linking Words
increased slowly at 205
P
Use synonyms
by 2018.
Although
Linking Words
the rate of
hospitalistaions
Correct your spelling
hospitalisations
accounted for 75
P
Use synonyms
in 2004,
before
Correct pronoun usage
it
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experienced
increase
Correct article usage
an increase
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at
Change preposition
to
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160
p
Use synonyms
the following
years
Use synonyms
. Moving onto the remaining statistics,
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
Adlin had recorded
sharply decreased
Replace the word
a sharp decrease
.The rate of patient admissions initialed figure at 245
P
Use synonyms
in 2004,before
underwent
Verb problem
it
show examples
decreased
225
Change preposition
to 225
show examples
P
Use synonyms
the
Change preposition
over the
show examples
next 4
years
Use synonyms
,
then
Linking Words
had
Wrong verb form
apply
show examples
sharply reduced
at
Change preposition
to
show examples
110
Use synonyms
p
Capitalize the proper name
P
show examples
by 2018.

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "whereas".
Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 100%.
Vocabulary: Replace the words years, p with synonyms.
Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "illustrates" in your introduction.
Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "undefined" in your introduction.
Vocabulary: The word "figure" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: The word "figure" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: The word "decreased" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: The word "increase" was used 4 times.
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