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Writing Samples
Band 7

Some people think university education should be free for everyone. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

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Introduction
There is
growing
Correct article usage
a growing
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 debate over whether
university
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education
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 should be provided free of charge to all
students
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.
While
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 it is understandable why some people support
this
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 view, I largely agree with it, as removing tuition fees could widen access to higher
education
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 and promote greater social mobility.
Body paragraph 1
The most compelling reason for
this
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 position is that free
university
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education
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 could widen access to higher
education
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.
This
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 is particularly important because tuition fees can place a substantial financial burden on
students
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 from low-income families. In practical terms, removing these costs would allow academically capable
students
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 to pursue a degree without having to rely heavily on their families or take on significant debt. A clear example of
this
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 can be seen in
students
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 from disadvantaged backgrounds who may
otherwise
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 be forced to enter the workforce immediately after school.
As a result
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, a wider range of people could obtain professional qualifications, making it considerably more likely that higher
education
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 would contribute to greater social mobility.
Body paragraph 2
A
further
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 point worth considering is that free access to
university
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 could produce broader economic benefits. The underlying reason is that a larger proportion of the population would have an opportunity to acquire specialised knowledge and professional skills.
This
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 can have far-reaching consequences, particularly for countries that depend on a highly educated workforce to remain economically competitive.
For instance
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, if talented
students
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 are not prevented from attending
university
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 by financial constraints, more of them may eventually enter fields
such
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 as medicine, engineering and finance. Taken together, these effects suggest that publicly funded higher
education
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 can benefit society beyond the individual student, which
further
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 strengthens the case for making
university
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education
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 more accessible.
Conclusion
In conclusion,
although
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 providing free
university
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education
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 would place a considerable financial burden on governments, I believe that it should be made accessible to all
students
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.
This
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 is primarily because it can remove financial barriers to higher
education
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,
while
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also
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 contributing to a more skilled and productive workforce.

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task response
Your view is clear from the start: you mostly agree. To make it even stronger, explain more fully why you do not agree in every case. For example, say that the state may need to limit free places or ask high earners to pay more later.
task response
Your two main ideas are well chosen: fair access and help for the economy. Add one more clear detail about how the state could pay for free study, because cost is the main problem in this topic.
task response
Your examples fit the ideas, but they are general. Use one short, real or clear made-up case, such as a student from a poor family who becomes a doctor after free study.
coherence and cohesion
The essay has a clear shape: opening, two main parts, and an ending. Each paragraph stays on one main idea, so it is easy to follow.
coherence and cohesion
Your linking words work well, such as “As a result”, “For instance”, and “In conclusion”. Do not add too many links in one paragraph; keep using them only when they show a real step in the idea.
coherence and cohesion
Some sentences are quite long. Split a few of them into two shorter sentences to make the meaning even easier to read. This is most useful in the second main paragraph.
task response
You answer all parts of the question and keep a clear opinion throughout the essay.
task response
The ideas are relevant and well explained. You show both personal gains for students and wider gains for society.
coherence and cohesion
The opening clearly states the topic and your view, while the ending brings the main points together.
coherence and cohesion
The order of ideas is logical: first access for poorer students, then the wider good for the country.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • university education
  • higher pay
  • sweated and sacrificed
  • higher education
  • time, effort, and financial investment
  • specialized knowledge and skills
  • job prospects
  • economic contributions
  • valuable contributions
  • fairness and equality
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