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Writing Samples
Band 5.5

Many People believe that current system of both teachers and students in the class room will no longer exist by the year 2050. To what extent do you agree with this statement

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Introduction
In
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
recent decades, there have been increasing arguments that the present structure of learning, where both
teachers
Use synonyms
 and
students
Use synonyms
in
Verb problem
are in
show examples
 the same classroom, will be eradicated by the year 2050.
While
Linking Words
 technology and online tools are likely to grow and change how some lessons are delivered, I strongly oppose
this
Linking Words
 notion. I believe that face-to-face teaching will remain effective and necessary for years to come.
Body paragraph 1
First,
Linking Words
attending classes in person
continue
Correct subject-verb agreement
continues
show examples
 to prove effective, because
teachers
Use synonyms
 can guide
students
Use synonyms
 in real-time. When pupils have difficulty
to understand
Wrong verb form
understanding
show examples
 some lessons,
teachers
Use synonyms
 are present to explain it clearly and instantly in various ways. Even by 2050 , when artificial intelligence and digital platforms may offer more personalised practice, the immediate human response and adjustment that a human professor provides cannot be fully
replicate
Wrong verb form
replicated
show examples
 by machines.
Body paragraph 2
Furthermore
Linking Words
, being physically present inside the study hall,
students
Use synonyms
 can be more productive as distractions are reduced. Unlike at home, where family noise and household chores can divert focus from studying, lecture rooms are dedicated
for
Change preposition
to
show examples
 educational purposes with the supervision of lecturers.
Also
Linking Words
, life skills,
such
Linking Words
 as collaboration, teamwork, and
leadership
Punctuation problem
leadership,
show examples
 are developed during interaction with peers.
For instance
Linking Words
,
laboratory
Add an article
a laboratory
show examples
 experiment, which is absent in online courses, allows
students
Use synonyms
 to work with each other, exchange ideas, and observe actual activities using all senses. 
Thus
Linking Words
, personal development is more stimulated
unlike
Correct word choice
than
show examples
 in home schooling.
Conclusion
In summary,
while
Linking Words
advance
Replace the word
advanced
 technology will play a role by 2050 in teaching methods, I do not think that lectures with real
teachers
Use synonyms
 and
students
Use synonyms
 will disappear. They still provide better guidance,
and
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
experience, and aid young people
develop
Verb problem
to develop
show examples
 important personal traits, that produces not just academically qualified but well-rounded graduates.

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Task response
Your view is clear: you do not agree that teachers and students in a class will end. Keep this clear view from the start to the end.
Task response
Your main ideas are good: real-time help, fewer distractions, and social skills. Explain each idea a little more. For example, say why a teacher may give better help than an online tool in a hard lesson.
Task response
The lab example is useful, but the claim that labs are absent from online courses is too strong. Say that online courses cannot fully give the same hands-on lab work and group work.
Task response
You answer the question well, but you could briefly accept that some lessons may move online. This would make your view more balanced while keeping your main point.
Coherence and cohesion
Your essay has a clear shape: an opening, two main parts, and an ending. Each main part has one key idea, so it is easy to follow.
Coherence and cohesion
Use linking words with care. Words such as “First”, “Furthermore”, “For instance”, and “In summary” help the reader, but do not use too many in one part.
Coherence and cohesion
Make some links between sentences smoother. For example, after the point about focus in class, clearly show that the next point is about social growth, not focus.
Coherence and cohesion
Check word forms and agreement so your meaning stays clear. For example: “attending classes in person continues”, “difficulty understanding”, “cannot be fully replicated”, and “advanced technology”.
Task response
You give a direct answer and stay on the topic throughout the essay.
Task response
Your reasons are relevant and easy to understand, especially the points about quick teacher help and learning with other students.
Coherence and cohesion
The opening tells the reader your view, and the ending returns to that view clearly.
Coherence and cohesion
The example of lab work fits your point about students learning together in a real place.
Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • teacher
  • students
  • class
  • classroom
  • learn
  • home
  • study
  • lesson
  • change
  • future
  • tool
  • help
  • guide
  • group
  • work
  • talk
  • think
  • more
  • less
  • cost
  • access
  • policy
  • time
  • year
  • 2050
  • different
  • will
  • could
  • should
  • together
  • this
  • that
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