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Writing Samples
Band 6.5

It is becoming increasingly popular to have a year Off between finishing school and going to university. What are the advantages and disadvantages Of this?

6.5 / 9
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Introduction
Nowadays, many people argue about the idea of having a break between finishing high school and going to university. So,
this
Linking Words
 essay will demonstrate how a gap year can be beneficial for some students, but
also
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 how it can lead to complications for them when they continue studying.
Body paragraph 1
A gap year can be very beneficial for students after finishing high school. It can help them to travel, gain work experience or just take a break to unwind after all the pressures of 18 years.
For instance
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, in France, the president tried to encourage people to take a break.
In addition
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, there are many forums presenting some specific programs for going abroad to work, to do volunteering, or just to find themselves.
Additionally
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, it gives some the chance to discover other things beyond what they have learned, to understand the world.
Body paragraph 2
But
this
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 period of time can lead to difficulties in restarting studies after a long time without any academic pressure, which can encourage many to continue without pursuing
further
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 studies.
Furthermore
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, it can change their mindset about their future life and ambitions and decrease their motivation.
For example
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, in 2015, in Belgium, the education minister did not give students the opportunity to do a gap year because it would be difficult to integrate into a well-known university because of the strict selection process.
Conclusion
To conclude
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,
this
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 period of time can be essential for some people, but it can create some difficulties for others to restart a new routine.
Finally
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, it depends on one's goals and ambitions.

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Task response
You answer both parts of the question: good points and bad points. To make your ideas stronger, explain each point more fully. For example, say how work can help a student choose a course, or why travel can help them grow.
Task response
Some examples are not clear enough. The points about France and Belgium need more detail, and it is not clear if they are true. Use a clear, simple example from student life instead.
Task response
Your main point about a break from study is good. Add one more clear good point, such as saving money for university, and one more bad point, such as losing study skills.
Coherence and cohesion
Your essay has a clear start, one paragraph for good points, one for bad points, and an ending. This makes it easy to follow.
Coherence and cohesion
Use linking words with care. You use “In addition” and “Additionally” very close together. Try other simple links, such as “Also”, “As a result”, and “On the other hand”.
Coherence and cohesion
Make the link between ideas clearer. For example, after saying that students may lose the habit of study, explain that this can make the first months at university hard.
Coherence and cohesion
Keep the same words for key ideas. Use “gap year” more often instead of changing it to “this period of time”, as this helps the reader follow your meaning.
Task response
You give a balanced answer by showing that a gap year can help some students but may cause problems for others.
Task response
You include useful ideas such as travel, work, rest, and lower desire to study.
Coherence and cohesion
The introduction clearly tells the reader what the essay will discuss.
Coherence and cohesion
The conclusion gives a clear final view: the result can depend on a person’s goals and plans.
Answer the 'Advantages and Disadvantages' topic

IELTS advantages and disadvantages questions normally give you a statement and ask you to comment on the advantages and disadvantages of that statement.

Answer structure for the type of essay

  • Introduction
  • Body paragraph 1 – advantages
  • Body paragraph 2 – disadvantages
  • Conclusion

Examples to start your body paragraph:

  • The main advantage is...
  • The disadvantage of this...
  • The main benefit...
  • Despite these advantages...
  • One possible drawback...

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • gap year
  • work experience
  • internships
  • traveling
  • life experiences
  • personal development
  • independent
  • self-reliant
  • educational progress
  • graduation timeline
  • financial burden
  • academic momentum
  • structured academic environment
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