Many museums charge for admission while others are free. Do you think the advantages of charging people for admission to museums outweigh the disadvantages

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
Some
museums
Use synonyms
have an
admission
Use synonyms
charge
Use synonyms
while
Linking Words
some do not. In my opinion, the drawbacks of an
entrance
Use synonyms
fee
Use synonyms
are eclipsed by its benefits in the sense that the income will be ploughed back into
Use synonyms
operation
Correct article usage
the operation
show examples
and development of the
museums
Use synonyms
. A major disadvantage of an
admission
Use synonyms
fee
Use synonyms
is the possibility of reducing the number of visitors.
Museums
Use synonyms
house exhibitions and artefacts of great educational and historical value. If the chief aim of a
museum
Use synonyms
is to introduce the local community,
admission
Use synonyms
should be free to the public and visitors. Take some folk
museums
Use synonyms
in Hong Kong, which preserve historic relics and display folk customs,
for example
Linking Words
.
Admission
Use synonyms
to these folk
museums
Use synonyms
, which are often monuments, is free of
charge
Use synonyms
. If they had charged an
entrance
Use synonyms
fee
Use synonyms
, many might have turned to other activities. Granted, an
entrance
Use synonyms
fee
Use synonyms
might have a negative effect on the
admission
Use synonyms
figures, but an income is
favorable
Change the spelling
favourable
show examples
to
museums
Use synonyms
in terms of
operation
Use synonyms
.
Museums
Use synonyms
feature educational exhibitions at times, and
this
Linking Words
could not have been done without a sum of money expended on hiring professionals and buying equipment. The Hong Kong Space
Museum
Use synonyms
,
for instance
Linking Words
, has monthly exhibitions on different issues and professional docents are employed to take visitors on a guided tour around the
museum
Use synonyms
.
This
Linking Words
example speaks volumes about how a reasonable
admission
Use synonyms
charge
Use synonyms
is advantageous to the
operation
Use synonyms
of a
museum
Use synonyms
. In conclusion, the disadvantages of an
admission
Use synonyms
fee
Use synonyms
are overshadowed by the benefits accruing from a stable source of income.
Therefore
Linking Words
, having weighed up the pros and cons, I am convinced that
museums
Use synonyms
should
charge
Use synonyms
an
entrance
Use synonyms
fee
Use synonyms
for the sake of
operation
Use synonyms
and
Correct your spelling
development
developmen
Correct your spelling
development
Submitted by florida333 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task achievement
Your essay shows a good understanding of the task and presents clear arguments. However, make sure to fully develop your points and provide more detailed explanations for your arguments. The essay would be improved by expanding on some of the points and providing more evidence.
coherence cohesion
Your essay has a clear logical structure and presents ideas in a coherent way. However, sometimes it is not immediately clear how the different parts of your argument relate to each other. Make sure to use more linking words to make the connections between your ideas more explicit.
lexical resource
Your vocabulary is quite broad, but you need to avoid repetition and use a wider range of expressions and more complex structures. Avoid using colloquial language in an academic essay.
grammatical range accuracy
Your grammar is generally good, but there are a few errors. Make sure to revise your work and eliminate any grammatical mistakes. Also, try to use a wider range of grammatical structures to show your ability at a higher level.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • Admission fee
  • Revenue stream
  • Maintenance
  • Overcrowding
  • Commercialization
  • Cultural heritage
  • Diverse attendance
  • Community ownership
  • Access to culture
  • Visitor experience
  • Exhibit quality
  • Cultural mission
  • Reliance on funding
  • Government subsidies
  • Cultural accessibility
What to do next:
Look at other essays: