It is expected that there will be a higher proportion of older people than that of young people in many countries in the future? Do you think it is a positive or negative development?

#proportion #people #countries #future #development

There is little doubt that in many countries, the number of senior people is growing steadily, and

this

is predicted to continue in the future. While I agree that

this

trend can bring several benefits to the society, I would argue that it has more disadvantages for many reasons. On the one hand, it is undeniable that aged citizens are more experienced and can contribute significantly to counselling young people. The reason is that they are able to give a variety of useful advice and instructions for younger generations thanks to their extensive experience.

In addition

, these days, parents usually have

such

a hectic schedule that they cannot spend much time with their children.

As a result

, grandparents could help take care of and raise their grandchildren in a family environment.

This

consequently

, would definitely make a great contribution in enhancing the relationship between grandparents and grandchildren.

On the other hand

, I suppose that

this

trend causes more drawbacks for both government and individuals.

Firstly

, the higher proportion of

aged

Suggestion

age

aging

people might be a strain on the national budget, as

government

Suggestion

the government

needs to allocate resources to medical care and retirement fund.

Secondly

, the

labor

a social class comprising those who do manual labor or work for wages

labour

force

also

suffers from the growing number of older citizens due to the shortage of productive workers. As a consequence, the economic progress might be affected negatively.

Last but not least

Suggestion

The last but not least

, the aging population could pose a burden on families since parents need to take care of older family members. In conclusion,

although

the remarkable increase in life expectancy has some positive impacts to the society, I would believe that its drawbacks are much greater.

Submitted by nhaianh27 on Sat Mar 30 2019

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11Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
4Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

269 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

7.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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It is expected that there will be a higher proportion of older people than that of young people in many countries in the future? Do you think it is a positive or negative development?

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

In many countries, people now wear western clothes such as suits and jeans rather than traditional clothing. Why is this the case? Is this a positive or negative development?

It must be a woman who stays at home to care for children. Men are not suited to this kind of work. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your knowledge or experience.

Nowadays, there is a greater focus at all levels in education on science and business studies rather that the arts. Do you think this is a positive or negative development?

Some experts believe that when a country is already rich, any additional increase in economic wealth does not make its citizens any more satisfied. Agree or disagree?