IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7

Scientific research should be carried out and controlled by the governments rather than private companies. Do you agree or disagree?

#research #governments #companies
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
These days, many people argue that governments should provide funds to conduct and control scientific
research
Use synonyms
instead
Linking Words
 of leaving in the hands of private corporations. In my opinion, I completely agree with
this
Linking Words
 point of view. It is undeniable that there are two significant dangers of private conduct of
research
Use synonyms
.
Firstly
Linking Words
, some private companies could be tempted to manipulate the results in order to maximize their profits. For those corporations, their priority is the profits and the reputation, and
thus
Linking Words
 they do not pay much attention in the accurate results of the
research
Use synonyms
.
Secondly
Linking Words
, from
ethical perspective
Suggestion
an ethical perspective
, allowing these companies to carry out scientific
research
Use synonyms
 is likely to cause profound social consequences.
For example
Linking Words
, the genetic modified crops, without unproven effects, might result in the whole ecosystem destruction due to meddling with nature.
Although
Linking Words
 national authorities have responsibilities to allocate resources to social welfare, I would believe that they
also
Linking Words
 need to finance in conducting scientific
research
Use synonyms
. Governments should provide funding for
universities so
Accept comma addition
universities, so
 that high-quality
research
Use synonyms
 can be carried out. In
this
Linking Words
 way, the knowledge,
that is
Linking Words
 gained from the
research
Use synonyms
, would be shared worldwide throughout the academic community.
In addition
Linking Words
, government- decision making is the best way to prioritize expenditure on specific areas of
research
Use synonyms
, taking
in
Suggestion
into
 account the needs of society, both present and future. One example is the development of renewable energy to meet growing demands. In conclusion, for all the reasons as mentioned above, I would maintain that conducting scientific
research
Use synonyms
 should be
governments’ responsibility
Suggestion
the governments’ responsibility
 rather than private companies.
Submitted by nhaianh27 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • scientific research
  • carried out
  • controlled
  • governments
  • private companies
  • unbiased
  • prioritize
  • profit
  • public interest
  • allocate resources
  • lucrative
  • collaboration
  • information sharing
  • confidential
  • competitive advantage
What to do next:
Look at other essays: