IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 6

People living in large cities have to face many problems in everyday life. What are those problems? Should the government encourage people to move to regional towns?

#people #cities #face #life #government #move #towns
In recent years, there have been a number of problems that people in big cities have to cope with every day. My essay will discuss two major problems which are
pollution
 and
information
 overload, and personally I think those people should be encouraged to move to regional areas. Increased levels of
pollution
 have been a great reason for concern among residents of big cities. Owing to a high volume of everyday traffic, massive quantities of pollutants
such
 as CO2 are constantly released into the atmosphere, causing the degradation of air quality.
This
 is closely associated with various types of respiratory diseases or even lung cancer.
Also
, people in big cities are being bombarded with too much
information
 from the media, including TV, social networking sites and advertisements while
the large
Suggestion
the largest
larger
largest
 proportion of
information
 is fake news or exaggerated commercials.
This
 can cause confusion or, in some cases, social anarchy. In my opinion, the Government should do what they can to encourage city dwellers to move to regional areas.
First
, it will reduce the number of vehicles in cities, which will definitely improve the situation where air
pollution
 caused by traffic disturbs the lives of city residents.
Furthermore
, fewer people living in big cities will relieve the pressure on these cities’ housing supply systems when many people are living reluctantly in small, suffocating spaces. I think
this
 is
extremely important point
Suggestion
an extremely important point
 to consider because living spaces are linked to people’s mental health and how they perform at work. In conclusion, severe air
pollution
 and
information
 bombardment are among the most serious problems facing city dwellers nowadays, and I feel that
relevant authorities
Suggestion
the relevant authorities
 should encourage people to relocate to other areas to live.
Submitted by prasannakumar0416 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: