Some people thịn that it is better for children to study hard when they are young while others belive that it is better for children to have more time to play. Discuss both these views and give your opinion.

In
this
day and age, education is a vital key that improves the standard of living and the quality of life for humans.
Therefore
, it is commonly
thuoght
the content of cognition; the main thing you are thinking about
thought
taught
that children had better study hard from the
time
when they are young.
Nonetheless
, there are
also
some people who argue that young individuals should spend much more
time
playing than studying. In
this
essay,
i
refers to the speaker or writer
I
will look at both sides of the argument and give my honest opinion. It is obviously seen that children will get benefit from studying hard when they are young. Most people agree that acquiring knowledge early tends to assist children broaden their minds and maximize their
potentials
Suggestion
potential
. Taking learning to play
musical instrument
Suggestion
a musical instrument
as a helpful example, various children who learn how to play the guitar have a tendency
ti
in the direction of
to
be more creative than
ones
Suggestion
the ones
who do not. Another imperative
keypoint
Suggestion
key point
which supports the argument is that young people will supposedly not stuck in social evils. When studying hard, children are likely to focus on getting
high score
Suggestion
a high score
high scores
to satisfy their parent 's expectation as well as make them
fell
undergo an emotional sensation or be in a particular state of mind
feel
proud.
Therefore
, they try their best to study as they
arre
a unit of surface area equal to 100 square meters
are
expected.
As a result
, they do not have
time
to participate in social evils.
Besides
, many people hold the view that learners should spend more
time
to playing
instead
of studying hard. It is because that children are actually eager to follow academic programs as much as possible. When they are young, children need
time
not only to
relax but
Accept comma addition
relax, but
also
explore the world.
Additionally
, a variety of children cannot bear the pressure and have a tendency to
stuck
Suggestion
stick
in numerous mental problems when they try hard to learn. There is no doubt that young learners will lack
time
to relax if they make great efforts to learn.
Therefore
, they will get a diversity of mental issues
such
as stress,
autistism
or even suicide. To sum up, despite the fact that children had better make an effort to study, various people hold the view that young learners need
time
to play or join in entertaining activities. As far as
i
refers to the speaker or writer
I
am concerned, children need
time
to explore and develop their abilities.
Moreover
, young people need to participate in social works
rahter
on the contrary
rather
than focusing on theory.
However
, their parents should support their children to help them maximize their
potentials
Suggestion
potential
.
Submitted by trungduong13082000 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: