The education you receive from your family is more important than the education you receive from school. To what extent do you agree with this statement and why?

People said that children are educated by family is more necessary than
school
. Some of them have a lot of different opinions. I think both
school
and family take
responsible
Suggestion
responsibility
for
rising
increasing in quantity or value
raising
their children, but it is useful for the kids to be taught by their family. I completely agree with
this
statement.
Firstly
, most of children live with their parents since they was born.
Therefore
, they will easily share emotions with parents and they will have many instructions from
parents
Suggestion
the parents
.
Moreover
, it is important for them to overcome difficult problems. Parents can make the kid are more comfortable due to they always make a word from their heart and a large number of them are people who inspire for their kids.
Conversely
,
education environment
Accept comma addition
education, environment
just is a place which can help students about their life and society. There
are
Suggestion
is
a wide range of parents do not dare to punish them when they have
mistake
Suggestion
mistaken
and do not correct.
School
Suggestion
The school
will strengthen the knowledge in a new prospective
instead
of parents.
However
, there are many students in a
school
for teacher to look after all of them so education at
school
just fast-track problem-solving skill and analysing for them.
As a result
, most of student are still young to aware of their attitudes. In conclusion, members of
family
Suggestion
the family
a family
are people who can influence in a child development. I think parents should spend more time to educate their
childrens
a young person of either sex
children
because parents' education is more important than
school
.
Submitted by thanhthao15012000 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
Topic Vocabulary:
  • financial literacy
  • budgeting
  • savings
  • investing
  • tax obligations
  • retirement planning
  • loans
  • credit
  • interest rates
  • crowded curricula
  • traditional academic subjects
  • real-life experiences
  • parental guidance
  • practical
  • intellectually rigorous
  • school syllabus
  • gig economy
  • income-streams
  • challenging
  • trained teachers
  • specialized field
What to do next:
Look at other essays: