You saw a brochure for a one-week walking tour in the mountains. You're very interested in taking part, but you're not very fit and are worried you wouldn't be able to keep up. Write to the tour operator. In your letter: • Explain why you're interested in the tour. • Ask for information about dates and prices. • Express your concerns about your fitness level

#brochure #tour #mountains #re #part #wouldn #operator #information #dates #prices #concerns #fitness #level

Dear sir / madam, My name is Liya and writing

this

letter to express my interest and enquire about your one-week walking

tour

package in the mountain. I received a brochure for a trip to the mountains .So, would like to collect some information regarding your trip. I am very excited about different types of risky or dangerous games that you will arrange for getting more enjoyment like mountain climbing, paragliding, skydiving etc.

Moreover

last

year I skipped a

tour

that was

also

included different

verities

Correct your spelling

varieties

show examples

of games, so I need to enjoy these holidays very well . I would

also

appreciate

Correct pronoun usage

it if

show examples

you could provide some details regarding the

tour

arrangement like

price

Add an article

the price

show examples

of the

tour

, place , mode of travel , food and accommodation , and especially about the dates because I need to submit

leave

Correct article usage

a leave

show examples

application in my office . I would

also

like to express my concerns about my health condition, because

last

month I faced a breathing problem

that is

because of dust allergy, so I need to know that place selected is suitable for me. I look forward

for

Change the preposition

show examples

your

replay

Correct your spelling

show examples

and my decision will

also

accordance

Change preposition

in accordance

show examples

with your response. Yours faithfully Liya

Submitted by Liya on Wed Apr 10 2019

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Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

firstly
secondly
thirdly
in additional
moreover
also
for example
for instance
therefore
however
although
even though
despite

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5Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Grammar mistakes
 

8 paragraphs

201 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Greeting and closing

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

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Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Governments should spend money on railways rather than roads. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

Today more and more people want things instanly. Why is this ? Is it positive or negative development ?

Every year several Ianuages die out. Some people think that this is not important because life will be easier if there are fewer languages in the world. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

In some countries young people are encouraged to work or travel for a year between finishing high school and starting university studies. Discuss the advantages and disadvantages for young people who decide to do this.

Many countries are struggling with increases in crime rates and some think that having more police on the streets is the best way to reduce these increasing levels of crime. To what extent do you agree or disagree?