IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

Some experts believe that it is better for children to begin learning a foreign language at primary school rather than secondary school. Do the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages?

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
Learning the foreign
language
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

 at primary school as compared to
higher
Suggestion
high
the high
 school is
adviced
having the benefit of careful prior consideration or counsel
advised
 by
few knowlegable people
Suggestion
a few knowledgeable people
few knowledgeable people
.Like everything it
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

also have
Suggestion
also has
 some pros and cons in my opinion,
advantages
Suggestion
the advantages
 are more in
qauntity
how much there is or how many there are of something that you can quantify
quantity
 than disadvantage. Looking at
positive side
Suggestion
the positive side
, the students will be more developed intelligently,
intellectualyy
in an intellectual manner
intellectually
 and socially. We know a child's brain can be easily
molded
shaped to fit by or as if by altering the contours of a pliable mass (as by work or effort)
moulded
 in any directions, so if we can easily make him to study other languages without any trouble.
For example
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, when we teach a child
english
an Indo-European language belonging to the West Germanic branch; the official language of Britain and the United States and most of the commonwealth countries
English
,
that is
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

 totally
different what he
Suggestion
different to what he
 is
hears
belonging to or associated with her
hers
 at home, a less effort is made as compared to elders.
in
Suggestion
In
 the same way we can teach them various languages and can remember for his life. By learning it, he can go for higher studies outside his country without learning
there
of them or themselves
their
language
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

. Like if he wishes to do his graduation in Germany its obligatory to learn and give exam in their native
language
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

. Even can apply for various
job
Suggestion
jobs
 in different countries and chances of
promoyion
a message issued in behalf of some product or cause or idea or person or institution
promotion
also
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

 get increased.
For instance
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, if there are two candidates for single post belong to same countries head of the company will prefer him as compare to
other
plural of other; the people or things not already mentioned
others
 as less effort has to be made to make him understand. Friend circles will automatically get
increaded
Suggestion
 because understanding between them will be good, by conveying each others
emotions
Suggestion
emotion
 perfectly. Observing
nagative
characterized by or displaying negation or denial or opposition or resistance; having no positive features
negative
, the students in
higher
Suggestion
high
 schools already have so many subjects to learn so it becomes hectic for them to learn extra subject. Like already said for outside
education
Accept comma addition
education, language
language
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

 has to be learned which is difficult at
this
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

 stage as
brain
Suggestion
the brain
 can not
cop
come to terms with
cope
 up with
this
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

 pressure
also
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

. In conclusion, noticing above two
condition
Suggestion
conditions
 its clear merits weighted more than demerits. So better to start teaching it at
lower classes
Suggestion
the lower classes
 than higher one.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • cognitive abilities
  • pronunciation
  • self-conscious
  • cultural awareness
  • global society
  • proficiency levels
  • competitive job market
  • foundational skills
  • qualified teachers
  • recreational activities
What to do next:
Look at other essays: