More children in developed countries are becoming overweight. This is a serious problem for wealthy countries. Discuss some causes and effects of this problem. Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
The number of overweight children has increased tremendously within developed nations.
This
Linking Words
is an extremely serious
problem
Use synonyms
which is caused by a number of factors
such
Linking Words
as poor diet and affects both the children and the society. One of the causes of overweight among children is poor diet. Children are exposed to unhealthy processed food
such
Linking Words
as fast foods which mainly contain sugar, fat and salt. Research has proven that consuming these foods tend to increase appetite which leads to overeating and overeating is directly linked to overweight. Another cause of overweight
problem
Use synonyms
among children is the lack of physical exercise. Physical exercise is very important as it enables children to transform calories from food into useful energy.
This
Linking Words
is very essential because without it the calories from food will be stored as fat within
the
Suggestion
The
body which will eventually lead to overweight. There are several effects
as a result
Linking Words
of children of overweight.
Firstly
Linking Words
,
children overweight
Accept comma addition
children, overweight
can lead to slow brain development
as a result
Linking Words
of lack of proper nutrients that facilitate growth.
This
Linking Words
is a
problem
Use synonyms
because
such
Linking Words
children will be unable to fully participate in their classes which can lead to isolation.
In addition
Linking Words
,
children overweight
Accept comma addition
children, overweight
can lead to low energy levels and low self-esteem.
Moreover
Linking Words
, another effect of overweight if not tackled often leads to obesity. Obesity is linked to various diseases
such
Linking Words
as diabetes, high blood pressure and high
cholesterol which
Accept comma addition
cholesterol, which
can cause irreversible damage in a child’s life. In conclusion,
children overweight
Accept comma addition
children, overweight
is a serious
problem
Use synonyms
that can lead to low energy levels, poor
selfesteem
Suggestion
self esteem
and various health diseases if it is not solved.
Submitted by ntake98 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • obesity
  • sedentary
  • caloric intake
  • processed foods
  • fast food culture
  • screen time
  • metabolic disorders
  • healthcare expenditure
  • lifestyle diseases
  • preventative strategies
  • nutritional education
  • public health policy
  • body mass index (BMI)
  • emotional well-being
  • stigmatization
  • exercise regimen
  • eating habits
  • junk food
  • socioeconomic factors
  • health literacy
What to do next:
Look at other essays: