In some country, online shopping is replacing shopping in stores. Do you think it is a positive or negative development?

#country #stores #development

Thanks to the fast-paced development of e-commerce, the measures of exchanging commodity become diverse. One of those is online shopping which is getting more and more popular. In my perspective, shopping on the internet has its pros and cons. The main advantage is to contribute to the

economic

Suggestion

economy

and the principal drawback

is computer crime

Suggestion

is a computer crime

. On the one hand, online shopping is an effective way for customers to save their time, especially those who have

hectic lifestyle

Suggestion

hectic lifestyles

a hectic lifestyle

. Nowadays, people rather place

order

Suggestion

an order

the order

and have goods delivered to the

door than

Accept comma addition

door, then

door then

go to stores in person.

Besides

, online shopping provides entrepreneurs with

opportunites

a possibility due to a favorable combination of circumstances

opportunities

to start up their business thanks to the lower expenditure compared with opening a store. To demonstrate, the renting fee is decreased and staff hiring is avoidable if merchants sell their things online.

Moreover

, that the development of e-commerce is getting faster makes

online shops

Suggestion

the online shops

compete enthusiastically with each other.

Then

comes

the better

Suggestion

the best

the good

customer services, the competition amongst sellers takes place.

On the other hand

, shopping on the internet prevents customers from touching commodity physically.

This

results in the customers’

disappointment

Suggestion

disappointed

when they receive the goods which do not live up to their expectation.

In addition

, customers may run the risks of being victimised by computer crime due to no confidentiality. It is prevalent that internet users

are stolen

Suggestion

steal

their personal information while placing order or completing

transaction

Suggestion

transactions

a transaction

the transaction

because of

security hole

Suggestion

a security hole

security holes

Furthermore

shopaholics

Suggestion

Shopaholics

who are not able to resist the temptation of shopping probably cope with

financial burden

Suggestion

the financial burden

financial burdens

Then

comes stores’ increasing turnovers, they attract their customers

Suggestion

to buy

buy

discount or buy one get one

programs

Suggestion

program

This

leads to an increase on demand for goods, along with buyers’ negative financial statuses. The more products customers buy, the worse their economic capability is. To sum up, online shopping brings benefit and convenience, much as some negative consequences of

this

means should be taken into consideration.

Submitted by ntduong.ftu on Mon Jun 03 2019

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Do you want to check your IELTS essays?

Submit unlimited essays, letters and charts. Sign up right now and start improving your writing skills.

7Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
16Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

317 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

6.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 & Task 2 checks
Practice with essays, charts, and letters.
Personalized suggestions & mistake analysis
Spot every mistake and boost your score.
Topic ideas & vocabulary helpers
Expand your ideas and use the right words.
Progress tracking
Watch your writing improve with every practice.

Download Free PDF
11 Most Commonly Used English Expressions »

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

7.5
band
Some people believe holding sports events are too expensive, such as olympic games,and the world cup. But others think in opponent way. Discuss both opinion, and give your own view.
Hosting International tournaments such as the Olympic games and the World Cup costs a fortune to organize these days. While some individuals opined that they are too costly, others have the opposite view. However, I think holding such peacekeeping and unifying competitions is not a mere waste of money as they are important in creating inter-border bonding, and this essay will consider both views.
5
band
Living in a country where you have to speak a foreign language can cause serious social problems, as well as practical problems. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?
Living in a nation which requires you to communicate by a language other than your mother tongue can cause both tremendous social problems and practical problems to a person. In my opinion, I will agree with this opinion if there are some requirements attached to it.
6
band
The impact of social media has increased tremendously in people’s lives. Discuss the advantages and disadvantages of this phenomenon.
In recent times, while proponents have a point of view that communication through media platforms has become important, opponents have the opposite opinion of limiting the use of social media. Moreover, social media makes people’s lives easier by letting them know friends’ news immediately. I agree with the first opinion on the positive impact of social media on our lifestyle.
5
band
Living in a foreign country where you have to speak a foreign language can cause serious social problems, as well as practical problems. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?
There is no denying that social and practical issues could be raised when people are not a native speaker of the nation they live in. I firmly agree with this idea that speaking foreign languages could potentially lead to a variety of real-life difficulties. In the following essay, I’m going to outline the reason behind my opinion on this thesis.
6
band
Despite the increased access to education, a significant number of people cannot read or write. What are the disadvantages without these skills? And What actions should governments take?
The main focus of education is catering to the exam-oriented education system, resulting in numerous individuals lacking reading and written abilities. It embarked the public awareness and the relevant administrative department should shoulder the responsibility of addressing these problems.

In some country, online shopping is replacing shopping in stores. Do you think it is a positive or negative development?

Fully explain your ideas

Some people believe holding sports events are too expensive, such as olympic games,and the world cup. But others think in opponent way. Discuss both opinion, and give your own view.

Living in a country where you have to speak a foreign language can cause serious social problems, as well as practical problems. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

The impact of social media has increased tremendously in people’s lives. Discuss the advantages and disadvantages of this phenomenon.

Living in a foreign country where you have to speak a foreign language can cause serious social problems, as well as practical problems. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

Despite the increased access to education, a significant number of people cannot read or write. What are the disadvantages without these skills? And What actions should governments take?