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Writing Samples
Band 5.5

Successful sports professionals can earn a great deal more money than people in other important professions. Some people think this is fully justified while others think it is unfair. Discuss both of these views and give your own opinion.

#sports #professionals #money #people #professions
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These days, a lot of
sport
Use synonyms
 professionals are paid excessively. A number of people think that it is not justifiable, while others contend that it is fair. In my opinion, it is valid to highly
compensate
Suggestion
compensated
sport
Use synonyms
 persons, and in
this
Linking Words
 essay, I will support my view with examples. On the one hand, those who argue players should not be paid excessively deem that, it is perverse to prioritize only one profession. In many cases,
this
Linking Words
 is due to the existence of numerous jobs. To illustrate, there are many jobs like doctors and engineers, which often require higher investments, yet they are unfairly compensated.
Secondly
Linking Words
,
people
Suggestion
the people
 of
this
Linking Words
 opinion put that some
sport
Use synonyms
 professionals earning excess amount are aberrant. They say that there are instances of events where players are immoral, and they have risked public life.
However
Linking Words
, I think that players should be highly compensated, for it usually involves risks. Due to the unforeseen aftermath like strained hamstring or pulled leg in football, they ought
to be paid highly
Suggestion
to be highly paid
.
This
Linking Words
 is because unless a team justifies the risk with higher pay, sportsmen will not give their full effort.
Secondly
Linking Words
,
sport
Use synonyms
 professional should be paid enormously because most of them are famous, and they often opt for team offering greater benefits. By offering larger benefits, the most sought-after player can be lured. Having looked at both sides,
although
Linking Words
sport
Use synonyms
 professionals follow immoral conducts and there have been growing concerns regarding emphasizing merely one profession, we must
also
Linking Words
 look into the risk they put in and the strategies to attract them.
Thus
Linking Words
, they should be paid fairly.
Submitted by uttambohara07 on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • financial remuneration
  • exceptional
  • merit
  • talent
  • demand
  • entertainment value
  • career span
  • physical demands
  • justified
  • unfair
  • criticism
  • income inequality
  • societal priorities
  • sportsmanship
What to do next:
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