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Writing Samples
Band 4

University should accept equal number of male and female students in every subject. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#university #students
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Nowadays, a growing number of people argue that universities should take
gender
Use synonyms
 into consideration during the admission process. They claim that seats in each field of study should be equally divided between males and females. I agree with
this
Linking Words
pont
a geometric element that has position but no extension
point
points
 of
view but
Accept comma addition
view, but
 we should bear in mind that
students
Suggestion
student's
students'
 qualifications should be the most contributing
factr
anything that contributes causally to a result
factor
 in admission. In
this
Linking Words
 essay I will support my opinion with examples.The
first
Linking Words
 reason behind the tendency towards making
gender
Use synonyms
 part of the conditions in accepting
univerity
the body of faculty and students at a university
university
 students is to
gurantee
give surety or assume responsibility
guarantee
guaranty
grunt
 the diversity in
workplace
Suggestion
the workplace
. Those students are potential workers who might become engineers
,
Accept space
,
 doctors
,
Accept space
,
 teachers
,..
Accept space
,..
etc.
Suggestion
Etc.
in
Suggestion
In
 the future. Recent research and statistical studies have proven that diversity in the workplace is one of the key factors of success.
For example
Linking Words
,
Accept space
,
engineering profession
Suggestion
the engineering profession
 in the
middleast
an area that is approximately central within some larger region
middles
 is dominated by males because the number of males who study engineering is as twice as the females.
This
Linking Words
 makes it hard for the companies to have
diversified environment
Suggestion
a diversified environment
 where they can take the advantage of a spectrum of different skills and abilities.
On the other hand
Linking Words
,
Accept space
,
 some people argue that there should not be a
gender
Use synonyms
-based quota in universities. Their view is that certain profession are preferred by one
gender
Use synonyms
 more than the other. They
also
Linking Words
 claim that by having
such
Linking Words
 conditions
,
Accept space
,
 qualification will play a
second
Linking Words
 role. In my opinion
,
Accept space
,
 subject preference varies from person to person. Nowadays
,
Accept space
,
 we see many examples of successful women in fields that are commonly viewed as
males
Suggestion
male
proffissions
the body of people in a learned occupation
professions
professionals
profession
.
In addition
Linking Words
,
Accept space
,
 universities can control the admission process to make sure that
students qualifications
Suggestion
the student's qualifications
student's qualifications
students' qualifications
student qualifications
 are the
first
Linking Words
 condition to meet before applying the
gender
Use synonyms
 quota.In conclusion
,
Accept space
,
 giving equal chances to both vendors in different university programs is a positive step towards a diversified working environment.
However
Linking Words
, universities should make sure that
students qualification
Suggestion
the students' qualification
students' qualification
student's qualification
student qualification
 required for each field is the
first
Linking Words
 priority.
Submitted by Kenny on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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