Successful sports professionals can earn a great deal more money than people in other important professions. Some people think that this is fully justified while others think that it is unfair. Discus both these views and give your own opinion. Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

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It is commonly believed by some that athletes who are successful in their career, can make
hefty amount
Suggestion
a hefty amount
as
compare
Suggestion
comparisons
compared
to the professionals in other significant occupations, while, others think it is unjust. In my opinion, the degree of efforts contributed by sportsmen in terms of physical activity, mental strength and consistency make it reasonable to attain high earnings.
Firstly
Linking Words
, selecting sports as career makes them to involve into
high level
Suggestion
high levels
a high level
of physical workout. They have to go through massive competition and sustaining at
such
Linking Words
tough times makes them stand apart from other careers as they represent a country in international events.
Secondly
Linking Words
, sports professionals put their whole life
on
Suggestion
at
stake by choosing
such
Linking Words
a volatile profession in which there is less security for the future as compare
to
Suggestion
with
other occupations.
For instance
Linking Words
, an athlete is only considered to be a part of the team
untill
up to, before the time
until
his performance is going
good
Suggestion
well
, which clearly shows that they are real risk takers.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, it is completely true that they don’t contribute much socially as professional from other fields like doctors and scientists do. Doctors treat people give their services for
humanity
Suggestion
humanists
and scientists
also
Linking Words
contribute through their inventions.
Smooth running
Suggestion
The smooth running
of any locality is difficult without them.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, if we count the social efforts contributed by people in these
profession
Suggestion
professions
is far more than an athlete. To conclude,
however
Linking Words
, if we consider the social contribution made by professionals in other fields, they definitely deserve a high emoluments but sports professionals
also
Linking Words
bring name and fame to country at international level so they worth it.
Submitted by Ashu on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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