Wealthy countries should accept more refugees and provide them with basic assistance, such as housing and food. To what extent do you agree or disagree.

Natural disaster

Suggestion

A natural disaster

has left many people homeless and hungry. I believe rich countries ought to accept and cater for refugees, so as to reduce mortality rate, and help them fulfil their dreams in life.

Survival rate

Suggestion

The survival rate

for refugees is very low, because they are exposed to harsh weather conditions and hunger. Since they are impoverished and

can not

cannot

get

good

Suggestion

better

housing and food, they die of cold and hunger. To illustrate, internally displaced persons due to war in Somalia have the highest death ratio in that country, primarily, due to hunger and harsh climate.

In addition

rehabilitational

the restoration of someone to a useful place in society

rehabilitation

services can be rendered in the camps to help the depressed out of depression and suicidal thoughts. Another reason why wealthy nations should take care of them is because, these people have dreams they want to fulfil in life. Being displaced and not able to go about their daily activities will not afford them the opportunity to work towards fulfilling their passions in life.

Hence

, they need adequate place of abode and nutrition to help motivate and keep their goals alive. John West,

for instance

, grew up in the American home for displaced persons, and became one of the leading icons in the world of Mathematics. His passion for calculation remained unaffected, because he was cared for. In conclusion, most homeless people are

product

Suggestion

a product

the product

products

of natural

disasaters

a state of extreme (usually irremediable) ruin and misfortune

disasters

disaster

and need shelter and food to survive. I think developed

counties

a politically organized body of people under a single government

countries

can be of tremendous benefit, so as to reduce

death rate

Suggestion

the death rate

among them, and help them live out their dreams.

Submitted by agvibrancy on Sun Jul 14 2019

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Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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3Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
9Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

255 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

Refugees
Asylum seekers
Humanitarian aid
Integration
Multiculturalism
Economic impact
Public services
International law
Conventions relating to the status of refugees
Labor market
Cultural enrichment
Burden-sharing
Resettlement programs
Host country
Border security
Comprehensive policy

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Wealthy countries should accept more refugees and provide them with basic assistance, such as housing and food. To what extent do you agree or disagree.

Fully explain your ideas

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

In some countries , students live with their family while studying at a university . In other countries ,students attend university in another city. Do you think the advantages of living away from family home while attending outweigh the disadvantages ?

In many countries, people do not recycle waste materials, such as bottles and newspapers. What are the reasons for this? What could be done to solve this problem

Out of a country’s health budget, a large proportion should be diverted from treatment to spending on health education and prevention measures. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

Many manufactured food and drink products contain high levels of sugar; which causes many health problems. Sugary products should be made more expensive to encourage people to consume less sugar. Do you agree or disagree?

Information technology enables many people to do their work outside their workplace (e.g. at home, when travelling, etc.). Do the benefits of this mobility outweigh the disadvantages?