Shopping is now one of the most popular forms of leisure activity in many countries for young adults. Why is this? Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?

#forms #leisure #activity #countries #adults #development

I completely agree that shopping has become topmost relaxing activities in almost all countries of the world. In my opinion,

this

activity has led to a lot of negative developments in society. There are many reasons for shopping replacing other activities.

Firstly

, the advancement of technology has made

purchasing

Suggestion

the purchasing

of products easier. The people can now purchase products with a single click from their home and no longer need to visit stores. Another reason why people prefer shopping is due to lack of friends. The teenagers are now more interested in spending their time on

phone

Suggestion

the phone

rather than interacting with people or making friends. All these factors

has led

Suggestion

have led

led

lead

to many negative

developements inculding

Accept comma addition

developments, including

developments inculding

developments including

developements including

: the rise of criminal activities in society. The youth wanted to buy expensive gadgets, clothes,

cars etc

Accept comma addition

cars, etc.

cars etc.

which they cannot afford.

Additionally

this

has resulted in

high stress leve

Suggestion

a high stress level

high stress level

high stress love

for young people and to reduce

this

they go for shopping.

Moreover

, the people

showoff

Suggestion

show off

their expensive acquisitions to feel better.

This

happiness is temporary and they follow

same cycle

Suggestion

the same cycle

again.

Furthermore

, the lack of any physical activity has resulted

into

Suggestion

many health problems. In conclusion, I strongly feel shopping has

tremendous negative impact

Suggestion

a tremendous negative impact

on society and should be dealt sooner rather than later.

Submitted by rahul78.bansal on Sun Jul 14 2019

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5Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
10Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

207 words

<4

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

leisure activity
consumer culture
material possession
social experience
disposable income
tech-savvy
convenience
fashion trends
overconsumption
economic stimulation
retail industry
materialism
debt
consumer spending
browsing

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Shopping is now one of the most popular forms of leisure activity in many countries for young adults. Why is this? Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?

Fully explain your ideas

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Nowadays celebrities earn more money than politicians. What are the reasons for this? Is it a positive or negative development?

Some people think that education should be the responsibility of the government but others think that it is the responsibility of the individuals themselves. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Nowadays. More and more people decide to have children in their later life .what do you think are for this reasons. Do the advantages of the trend outweigh the disadvantages.

Due to the development of the internet, public libraries are no longer necessary. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Many students find it is harder to study at university or college compared to when they were in grade school. Why is this? What are some possible solutions for this problem?