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Shopping is now one of the most popular forms of leisure activity in many countries for young adults. Why is this? Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?

#forms #leisure #activity #countries #adults #development
I completely agree that shopping has become topmost relaxing activities in almost all countries of the world. In my opinion,
this
 activity has led to a lot of negative developments in society. There are many reasons for shopping replacing other activities.
Firstly
, the advancement of technology has made
purchasing
Suggestion
the purchasing
 of products easier. The people can now purchase products with a single click from their home and no longer need to visit stores. Another reason why people prefer shopping is due to lack of friends. The teenagers are now more interested in spending their time on
phone
Suggestion
the phone
 rather than interacting with people or making friends. All these factors
has led
Suggestion
have led
led
lead
 to many negative
developements inculding
Accept comma addition
developments, including
developments inculding
developments including
developements including
: the rise of criminal activities in society. The youth wanted to buy expensive gadgets, clothes,
cars etc
Accept comma addition
cars, etc.
cars etc.
 which they cannot afford.
Additionally
,
this
 has resulted in
high stress leve
Suggestion
a high stress level
high stress level
high stress love
 for young people and to reduce
this
 they go for shopping.
Moreover
, the people
showoff
Suggestion
show off
 their expensive acquisitions to feel better.
This
 happiness is temporary and they follow
same cycle
Suggestion
the same cycle
 again.
Furthermore
, the lack of any physical activity has resulted
into
Suggestion
in
 many health problems. In conclusion, I strongly feel shopping has
tremendous negative impact
Suggestion
a tremendous negative impact
 on society and should be dealt sooner rather than later.
Submitted by rahul78.bansal on

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • leisure activity
  • consumer culture
  • material possession
  • social experience
  • disposable income
  • tech-savvy
  • convenience
  • fashion trends
  • overconsumption
  • economic stimulation
  • retail industry
  • materialism
  • debt
  • consumer spending
  • browsing
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