Some people think that the government is wasting money on the arts and that this money could be better spent elsewhere. To what extent do you agree?

#people #government #money #arts

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It is undeniable that the arts

have played

Suggestion

played

a crucial role in human society for ages,

however

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, there has been concern among some individuals that government’s revenue are being contributed excessively to

this

Linking Words

creative field and that it could be effectively allocated elsewhere. While I partly agree with

this

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view, I will argue that investment in the arts is worthy. There’s no denying that authority must equally

distributes

Suggestion

distribute

money to a vast number of priorities which are immensely essential for the community as a whole,

such

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as education, infrastructure, health care, economy and welfare. They are all key features which have the direct impact on the

life

Use synonyms

’s quality of billions of people worldwide. Developed nations with high standard

life

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, namely, Sweden, Denmark, The UK, The US are investing a multitudinous amount of money on those mentioned sectors annually to secure a

comfort

Suggestion

comfortable

life

Use synonyms

for their citizens. Despite of the fact that national leaders should prioritize the factors above when considering the distribution of state budget, they should acknowledge the importance of

arts

Suggestion

the arts

to the population and countries as well. They considerably help us to alleviate stress in the busy modern

life

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For example

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, after a

long tiring

Accept comma addition

long, tiring

day at work, people often opt for movies or artistic performances to unwind themselves.

Furthermore

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arts

Suggestion

the arts

Suggestion

are also considered

also

Linking Words

considered the cultural bridge between the past and the present of one’s country. Youngsters attain comprehension and useful knowledge about their country in an accessible way through recreational artistic forms. Some popular traditional artwork in my country which deserve to be mentioned is ‘’Dong Ho paintings’’ which depict the daily

life

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of Vietnamese in the past or ‘’

Suggestion

Tru Hue’’- our national cultural heritage recognized by UNESCO. In conclusion, I agree that state funding should be spent wisely for various purposes, it’s completely worth it to be allocated for the arts.

Submitted by lan.hoangnguyen25 on Tue Jul 16 2019

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Fully explain your ideas

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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6
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
8
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.5

Complete response

5.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

306 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

enriching society
promoting cultural understanding
development of talent
creative industries
economic benefits
generate revenue
cultural heritage
identity
prioritize spending
needs of the majority

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Some people think that the government is wasting money on the arts and that this money could be better spent elsewhere. To what extent do you agree?

Fully explain your ideas

Some people decide to start their own business instead of working for a company or organization. Do the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages?

Some people think that it is good for a country's culture to import foreign movies and TV shows. Others think that it is better to produce these locally. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

should long term job seekers in receipt of government benefits be made to do voluntary work so that they can give something back to the community?

Nowadays celebrities are more famous for their glamour and wealth than for their achievements, and this sets a bad example to young people. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

Many doctors say that people in today’s world do not do enough physical exercise. What do you think are the causes of this? What solutions are there to these problems?