Some people think that art is an essential subject for children at school while others think it is a waste of time. Discuss both views and give your opinion

#people #art #children #school #waste #time

People have different views about whether

art

should become one of important subjects for the youth or not. While many arguments assume that learning about

art

school

is time consuming, others are on the contradicting

view

Suggestion

views

. Personally, I would contend that

art

should be taught in optional courses. On the one hand, there are some reasons for the idea of removing

art

classes from

school’s schedule

Suggestion

the school’s schedule

. One realistically

cogent reason

Suggestion

the cogent reason

is that

art

is not an essential skill for life

survival

Suggestion

survived

. People still can find a job and earn for living without an

art

Suggestion

artistic

talent. In fact, there are not many job opportunities for artists compared with other common sectors,

hence

, some parents would incline to equip their children with academic knowledge rather than

art

techniques so that kids’ future would be guaranteed with an easier and brighter career path.

Therefore

, it is not unreasonable for those who consider that spending time for these subjects is

such

a waste resulting in their intention of the cancellation.

On the other hand

, there are some points of view that support the necessary of

art

courses in

school

. It can be seen that practicing

art

activities could develop the young generation’s creativities.

Besides

, initial

art

classes could help children explore their passion and

ability

Suggestion

abilities

, thereby gradually germinate and evolve their talent.

Moreover

, a few hours of learning

art

could be able to help children relax after other academic subjects.

However

, to my mind,

although

there are both merits and drawbacks of

art

courses, they should not be completely removed or become an essential subject. I believe some kids enjoy doing

art

, others might feel uncomfortable.

Hence

, I would like to suggest that

school

can make these

courses optional

Suggestion

optional courses

. It should depend on the youth to decide to participate in or not. In conclusion, there are pros and cons for spending time for

art

school

nevertheless

, everyone

deserve

Suggestion

deserves

to freely make their own decision for how they spend in education stage.

Submitted by Thanh on Sun Jul 28 2019

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Fully explain your ideas

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Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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9Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
8Grammar mistakes
 

5 paragraphs

329 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

self-expression
critical thinking
problem-solving
cultural awareness
tolerant society
STEM subjects
employability
rigorous subjects
curriculum
school budgets
enriches
complements

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Some people think that art is an essential subject for children at school while others think it is a waste of time. Discuss both views and give your opinion

Fully explain your ideas

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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