Many criminals commit further crimes as source as they released from prison What do you think are the cause of this? What possible solutions can you suggestN
Committing a
crime
is a serious problem for societies. Specifically,numerous causes lead to crimes like economic, social, educational and psychological. Especially, outlaws repeat the same crime
after release. I consider, that there are plenty of problems that need a solution to the obstacle of committing lawlessness again.
Society is constructed on the law. And, members of society must obey the rules. But, there are plenty of causes that force people to broke
laws. Wrong verb form
break
As a result
, a member who is claimed guilty and imprisoned is expected to not commit the same case again. Nevertheless
, approximately all criminals commit the same activity again. This
points out unchanged causes. I strongly recommend that the community should be focused on resources for committing violations. To begin
with, the economic turmoils of an individual or a country have an important influence. For instance
, a member of the population must provide the basic needs of the family. The lack of providing force people to other ways. Additionally
, education level is another important factor. As we know that
ignorant people tend to commit crimes more than others. Correct word choice
apply
Moreover
, moral and ethical rules have a huge influence to deter
individuals from crimes. Change preposition
on deterring
Further
, the mental health of a person is very important. For instance
, psychological assistance may diminish violation rates.
However
, authorities do not realise the importance of assistance after the release. I believe a good rehabilitation program and assistance after release could have a huge impact on repeat
of the Add an article
a repeat
committing
Correct word choice
apply
crime
. To illustrate, employment of former criminals and encouragement about
education can decrease the repeat of the same Change preposition
of
crime
.
İn conclusion, society should care about criminals. Because prosperity and improvement of the community also
depend on low crime
rates.Submitted by evren on
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task response
Ensure that all main points are well-supported with specific examples or evidence. This will strengthen your argument and illustrate your points more clearly.
coherence
Link your ideas more clearly from one paragraph to another, using appropriate transition words or phrases to enhance cohesion and the flow of the essay.
cohesion
Work on refining sentence structures and grammar for increased clarity and precision in conveying your ideas.
coherence
The essay has a clear and relevant introduction and conclusion, framing the discussion effectively.
task response
You identified key causes and solutions related to the topic, addressing the questions appropriately.
task response
You demonstrated clear engagement with the topic and made insightful points regarding societal factors of crime.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.
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