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Writing Samples /
Band 3.5

Many Students prefer to play computer games rather than play sports. Why is this? What can be done to tackle the problem?

#students #computer #games #sports
There are several reasons why many students
favor
promote over another
favour
 to play video games rather than physical activities. The
first
 reason is that some teenagers are lazy to exercise.
Therefore
, they spend a lot of
time
 playing video games. The
second
 reason is that the weather in Thailand is hot.
Thus
, they do not want to go outside and do their physical activities.
This
 can lead to health problems in the future.
For example
, If their bodies lose water too much, they can
faint
come upon, as if by accident; meet with
find
. The
third
 reason is that computer games are
interesting
Suggestion
more interesting
 than sports and are not tiring. Many students think video games are better than physical activities because they can learn something from them,
such
 as languages.
However
, there are several ways to solve
this
 problem.
First
 of all, students should manage their
time
 correctly. Video games have advantages and disadvantages. If they can balance their
time
,
then
 they can decrease the chance to be health problems. They can spend their
time
 on other activities.
Secondly
, game companies should create new technologies that have to use some parts of the body to move characters in their games.
Finally
, parents can spend their
time
 with their children, and they can develop their relationships.
For example
, they can play football with them.

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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