IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 5.5

Some people think that the government should pay one of the parents of very young children to stay at home to look after their children. What do you think would be the advantages and disadvantages of this policy? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

#people #government #parents #children #home #policy
Many countries provide financial assistance to the families having
new-born
recently born
newborn
 babies, as an aid to look after their kids.
This
 has been a hot debated practice, as some argue that providing
money
 for
such
 purposes can cause detrimental effects
in
Suggestion
on
 the society. Let us analyse the pros and cons of
such
 law. There are so many advantages to
this
 idea.
Firstly
, the government’s assistance to parents, in terms
money
, can be of great help to the low- and middle-class families. People, from
such
 surroundings, may not be able to afford to leave their job and be with their kids, and so, if they are provided with some monetary benefits from authorities, it would help to lessen their worries.
Secondly
, it is very critical in the growth of children to get maximum love and care from their parents, which is possible only by getting extra help like
this
 from
government
Suggestion
the government
. Some adepts
also
 point to the disadvantages of
such
 practice. Mainly, under-developed countries will have to budget more
money
 to implement
such
 laws, which might affect their financial stability, especially if
such
 country’s birth-rate is high. It is a luxury to implement only in
developed
Suggestion
developing
 nations.
In addition
 to that, some believe that it is the responsibility of parents to engender their offspring, and governments no need to pay any cash for that, but can help them in the form of other benefits like, paternity leave, free child health care, free education etc.. By taking both views into consideration, we may safely draw the conclusion that, it is not necessary to provide
money
 to parents, rather than helping them in many other ways and countries should implement
this
 assistance only if they have enough financial resources.
Submitted by starwinm on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
What to do next:
Look at other essays: