The only way to solve the increasing crime rate of young offenders is to teach parents better parenting skills. To what extent do you agree?

#crime #rate #offenders #parents #skills

Nowadays, criminal activities committed by teenagers are on the rise. Some people believe, improving parental techniques in parents is the sole way to curb

this

growing trend.

This

essay will discuss why I just partially agree with

this

statement. There are two primary reasons why

delinquency rate

Suggestion

the delinquency rate

in youngsters cannot be controlled just by employing better parenting aides.

Firstly

, since teenagers spend most of their time with their friends, they get directly influenced by them. If they indulge into bad company, there become prone to criminal activities.

For example

, a young fellow I know used to play football

Suggestion

the ground located in front of my house, started smoking and in a span of six months I saw him having narcotics due to bad companionship of his peers.

Secondly

, seminaries

also

play an important role in grooming students and help them become a responsible citizen of the society. It has been observed that neither teachers nor our syllabus is in line to fulfil

this

vital requirement.

For instance

, students these days don't even know the importance of laws and its implications. Institutes must organize trips to jails where they should see the misery of the people who have committed crimes in the past. Clearly, lawbreaking actions can be reduced massively by avoiding bad company and having schools focus more on educating students on the importance of laws and

repercussions

Suggestion

the repercussions

of breaking them. On the flip side, since parents are role-model for their children, they simply try to replicate their actions. If parents are habitual of abiding by the laws, children will

also

be following them because parents are generally the most influential personalities for their descendants.

For example

, the government of

UAE

Suggestion

the UAE

has initiated a reward program in order to appreciate good drivers on the roads. While interviewing the appreciated drivers most of them revealed

that they adhere the

Suggestion

that they adhere to the

traffic rules because their father used to do the same. Clearly, parents can play their part and improve the situation up to some extent. In conclusion,

this

essay discussed Why I believe that criminality in young criminals can be curtailed educating adolescents to void wicked fellowships and revisiting the emphasis of our

education

Suggestion

educational

curriculum. In my opinion, I partially agree with the statement and believe that educating parents will only bring about limited results and other strategies can be employed to overcome

this

problem.

Submitted by mairahassan03 on Thu Aug 01 2019

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Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

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firstly
secondly
thirdly
in additional
moreover
also
for example
for instance
therefore
however
although
even though
despite

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6Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
6Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

393 words

6.00

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.5

Complete response

7.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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The only way to solve the increasing crime rate of young offenders is to teach parents better parenting skills. To what extent do you agree?

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Disruptive school students have negative impact on their studies . Students are noisy and disobedient should grouped together and teaching separately. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some people claim that goverments should be responsible for taking care of the essential needs of the elderly, while others argue that it should be the elderly that should do so. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

It is commonly believed that nowadays main factors that affect a child's development are media, pop culture and friends. A different point of view is that family plays the most significant role. Discuss both views and give your opinion. Write at least 250 words.

Young people should spend more time on cultural activities such as music and theater and less time on sport. How far do you agree with this statement?

Museums and art galleries should focus on works that show the history and culture of their own country rather than works of other parts of the world. To what extent do you agree or disagree?