In the opinion of some people, the internet has narrowed the gap among people in the world by increasing social interactions. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this view?

Many people emigrate from their native countries nowadays. It has been a gradually increasing trend, as plenty of
perspective
Use the right word
prospective
show examples
students
as well as
Linking Words
ordinary workers leave their homelands hoping to become more successful.
However
Linking Words
, they usually have to separate from
families
Correct pronoun usage
their families
show examples
and leave their places of residence.
In
Change preposition
This
show examples
this
Linking Words
essay will
be discussed
Wrong verb form
discuss
show examples
the advantages and disadvantages of living and studying abroad.
To begin
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with, there are some considerable pros.
Firstly
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, the youth can study in foreign universities in order to become prosperous specialists, which is not a trivial goal to achieve in
the
Correct pronoun usage
their
show examples
native country.
For instance
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, some of the best Lithuanian pupils choose to study at
University
Correct article usage
the University
show examples
of Cambridge because it is considered to be one of the top universities in the world in terms of the quality of education.
Secondly
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, adults
also
Linking Words
migrate abroad if they want to earn more money and to have better career opportunities.
For example
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, the minimum salary in the UK is around 1000 pounds,
while
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in Lithuania it is 300 Euros.
Therefore
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, people can afford to satisfy their needs better
living
Change preposition
by living
show examples
in wealthy foreign countries.
By contrast
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, there
some
Verb problem
are some
show examples
cons too.
To begin
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with, leaving the homeland usually means damaging relationships with other people. In my personal experience, after my cousins left the
country
Punctuation problem
country,
show examples
they have not been socialising so much with their parents,
although
Linking Words
they have kept in touch with them.
Additionally
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, when a person owns a flat or a house,
he
Correct pronoun usage
they
show examples
should continue to pay taxes even if
he
Correct pronoun usage
they
show examples
leaves
Correct subject-verb agreement
leave
show examples
the
Correct pronoun usage
their
show examples
place of residence and
lives
Correct subject-verb agreement
live
show examples
abroad.
Thus
Linking Words
, noteworthy is the fact that one can miss relatives, and leaving home can be unpleasant sometimes. In conclusion, it can be seen that something should be sacrificed
Linking Words
due to
Change preposition
in
show examples
the
seeking
Check wording
pursuit
show examples
of a better life.
However
Linking Words
, it is generally advantageous to take the challenge of living in a foreign country to become a successful person, being it
education
Verb problem
is education
show examples
or work. It is hoped that all countries in the future will be able to provide
its
Fix the agreement mistake
their
show examples
citizens equal opportunities to achieve their life goals.

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task achievement
Try to include a clearer thesis statement in your introduction. Make your opinion about the topic obvious right away.
coherence and cohesion
Ensure that each paragraph clearly connects to the main topic and includes transitions to improve the flow.
task achievement
Provide more specific examples to support your points, which will make your arguments stronger.
task achievement
You successfully presented both sides of the argument, which shows depth in your thinking.
task achievement
Your use of examples like Cambridge and salary differences effectively illustrates your points.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example
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