IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7

The United Nations recently celebrated its 70th anniversary. What benefits has it brought during this time? Do you think the UN will last another 70 years?

#nations #anniversary #time #years
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
The United Nations was established at the end of the
Second
 World War in order to provide a peaceful way to resolve national differences. Since its formation 70 years ago, there has not been a
Third
 World War.
Furthermore
, the UN has expanded its global role to include many more activities
besides
 peacekeeping.
This
 essay will look at some of the UN’s achievements and predict what the future might hold for the
organisation
. It is difficult to imagine a world without the United Nations. The
organisation
 plays a leading role in everything from conflict resolution and peacekeeping to emergency food aid and global public health. Many people trust the UN because it is a democratic
organisation
 that reflects the interests of all its member states and not just one particular country. In
this
 way, it can be argued that the UN has restricted the influence of powerful countries like the USA, Russia and China, while allowing smaller nations a say in global affairs. It is
also
 effective at collecting funds from richer member states and redistributing it as economic aid or emergency assistance to parts of the world which need it most. Yet the world is a very different place from how it looked in 1945, which has led some people to question the need for a powerful
organisation
 like the UN.
In particular
, there are some proponents of free trade who argue that competition and not cooperation between nations is the fastest way to pursue economic development.
However
, I would argue that the more nations become interdependent, the more they will require a global forum to resolve their differences. While there are other global organisations that can play a similar role,
such
 as the World Bank and International Criminal Court, none has the scope of the UN. For that reason, the UN
is
Suggestion
has been
 sure to exist for decades to come, and possibly for another 70 years. In conclusion, the UN remains the most viable
organisation
 for dealing with the world’s problems, and
this
 is unlikely to change very soon.
Submitted by Sravani on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: