IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 6

Unpaid community service should be a compulsory part of high school programs (for example, working for a charity, improving the neighbourhood, or teaching sports to younger children). To what extend do you agree or disagree?

#community #service #part #school #programs #charity #neighbourhood #sports #children
There have been some recommendations that community
service
such
 as working for a charity, improving the neighbourhood, or teaching physical activities to children should be made compulsory for high school students. In my opinion, I completely disagree with
this
 as I believe public
service
 is an act that should be done willingly, not compulsorily.
Firstly
, public
service
 is a voluntary act.
This
 is because people who engage in these services within a community are volunteers who have identified the needs within the society and have resolved within themselves to commit their resources, which may include time and money to solving these needs. Taking
Nigeria
Accept comma addition
Nigeria, for
for example
, many people recently brought out themselves to fix a drainage problem observed around the city centre. They felt the health implication of the spillage from the gutters was going to impact on the wellbeing of the people living in the area.
As a result
, they took it upon themselves to sanitize the environment.
This
 was not done out of
compulsion but
Accept comma addition
compulsion, but
 from the willingness of the
people which
Accept comma addition
people, which
 demonstrates the importance of community
service
 being borne out of personal desire.
In addition
, sporting activities for children should be included as a compulsory exercise in schools because it is an important aspect of child development, not just a voluntary act. Doing
this
 will ensure that children incorporate physical activities as part of the lifestyle which will result to a healthier life in
future
Suggestion
the future
. In conclusion,
although
 social services
such
 as neighbourhood maintenance and charity work should be done out of passion and desire to impact life rather by compulsion, sports should be made a compulsory subject for children in school to help them grow into healthier adults.
Submitted by agboonyinye on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: