There are many different types of music in the world today. Why do we need music? Is the traditional music of a country more important than the international music that is heard everywhere nowadays?

#music #world #country

Nowadays,

music

is one of

the fast

Suggestion

the fastest

fastest

growing

sector

Suggestion

sectors

in the world, and is categorized into a number of

genre

Suggestion

genres

. The benefits of

music

Suggestion

are

numerous, and has

being

have the quality of being; (copula, used with an adjective or a predicate noun)

been

helpful over the years. I believe that local

music

is more important than foreign

music

. Owing to the various merits of

music

, the importance of

song

Suggestion

the song

is inexhaustible.

Firstly

music

is therapeutic in nature to patients in the hospital. It gives

diversional

therapy because it diverts their attention from the health challenges to the lyrics of the song.

For instance

, women are encouraged to use

music

therapy in the labour rooms to help them direct their concentration away from the pains.

Furthermore

, entertainment

Suggestion

events cannot be complete without

music

This

is because

music

make

Suggestion

makes

occasions aglow and alive. Ultimately, the traditional

music portrait

Accept comma addition

music, portrait

mosaic portrait

identify

Suggestion

identifies

This

occurs as the kind of songs a man play can tell his originality. The result of

this

has

being

have the quality of being; (copula, used with an adjective or a predicate noun)

been

seen oftentimes in foreign lands when relationships were built owing to the listening of local songs.

For example

, a guy realized that his

door

neighbor

a person who lives (or is located) near another

neighbour

is a relative after he heard her playing his local songs.

Additionally

, patriotism is demonstrated when one plays his traditional song.

This

is due to the fact that every citizen should always be proud of their country as it brings the best out of the people. To sum up,

music

is the food to the soul.

Hence

, we need

music

to promote healing, and lighten up our events. In my view, the local songs of a nation

Suggestion

are

highly important than foreign musics from other countries

Fri Aug 09 2019

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8Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
14Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

266 words

5.50

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 9.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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There are many different types of music in the world today. Why do we need music? Is the traditional music of a country more important than the international music that is heard everywhere nowadays?

Your opinion

It is important for people to take risks, in both their professional lives and personal lives. Do the advantages of taking these risks outweigh the disadvantages?

With the rise in popularity of the Internet, newspapers will soon become a thing of the past. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

The world should have only one government rather than a national government for each country. Do the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages?