IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

Scientists believe that in order to protect the environment, people must use less energy in their daily lives. However, most people have not changed the way they live.Why do you think many people have not taken individual action?What could be done to encourage them to take action?

#scientists #environment #people #energy #lives #action
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There has been a rising concern with regards to the environment.
However
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, some researchers are on view that, only if individuals change their current lifestyle, it could lead in reducing the consumption of
energy
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. The development in the field of technology, has made the life of the people very convenient.
Hence
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, people have become very habitual towards the extensive usage of
energy
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 as it adds comfort to their life.
For example
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, people nowadays do not use much of public transport, as they prefer to use their own vehicle, because it is more comfortable for them.
In addition
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, to match up with their current fast paced life, people now have changed their traditional cooking habits, as now they prefer cooking meals in microwaves which takes lesser time but consumes more
energy
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.
Moreover
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, as people are not directly impacted, a number of people fail to understand the importance of the
energy
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 preservation.
Furthermore
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, the lack of awareness among the people in regards to
energy
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 preservation, has resulted in no actions being taken. In my view, the
government
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 intervention could be needed to encourage people to take actions to reduce the consumption of
energy
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. To start with, the
government
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 can improve the public transportation system, which can encourage the individuals to use the public transport.
Secondly
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, the
government
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 should
also
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 organise awareness programs which, can educate and encourage the individuals to save
energy
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. In my conclusion, it is important that as individuals we need to take measures to reduce and avoid wastage of
energy
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.
However
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, the
government
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 can create awareness among people, which could support
this
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 cause.
Submitted by bhavika_31 on

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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