IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6

More and more people in the city live in homes with small spaces or no outdoor areas. Do you think it is a negative or positive development?

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It is argued that plenty of people in urban areas tend to opt for small-space living without outside areas. Personally, I believe that
this
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 tendency produces both benefits and drawbacks. There are several cost-related advantages of living in small
spaces
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. In many countries, mass migrations from rural areas to megacities have increased population density, leading to high house prices.
Therefore
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, it would be more thrifty for new residents to rent small flats compared with houses with personalized outdoor
spaces
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, especially for those with low incomes. In Da Nang
city
Capitalize word
City
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,
for example
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,
while
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 a small apartment
maybe
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may be
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 around 70,000 dollars, a moderate-sized house with open space costs at least 200,000 dollars.
Additionally
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, people living in small flats do not need to spend a lot of expenditure on appliances or home maintenance,
hence
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 putting a little extra money each month into
savings
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a savings
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 account. Despite the benefits mentioned above, I believe that small accommodations can bring disadvantages to citizens.
Firstly
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, living in
this
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 type of accommodation could result in a lack of privacy, exerting negative influences on an individual’s independence.
For instance
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, it is difficult for me to spend time alone because I live with my sister and my uncle in a cramped flat in a high-rise building.
Secondly
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, outdoor
spaces
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 like front yards are an ideal place to do exercise and organize family activities
such
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 as barbecue
party
Fix the agreement mistake
parties
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. Living in a house without any open
spaces
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 would discourage people from doing
such
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 activities, causing them to suffer from a sedentary lifestyle. In conclusion, I argue that dwelling in small houses or flats without open
spaces
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 has both beneficial and detrimental effects.

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coherence cohesion
Provide more specific examples and evidence to support each point. Ensure that each paragraph is logically linked and builds upon the previous one.
task achievement
Ensure that the response fully addresses the task prompt and provides a clear, comprehensive overview of both the positive and negative aspects of living in small spaces.
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