IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7.5

Some countries are struggling with an increase in the rate of crime. Many people think that having more police on the streets is the only way to reduce crime. To what extent do you agree?

#countries #rate #crime #people #police #streets
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
The rise in criminal activity has been bothering some nations. Some people argue that putting an increased number of law enforcement agencies on the roads is the most effective solution in reducing crime. In my opinion, I agree that cops are the key to control
such
Linking Words
 exercises.
However
Linking Words
, closed-circuit television cameras are important too. Cops are essential to maintain discipline in the community. They use various strategies and methods to combat gangsters. Their presence on the streets gives pedestrians a feeling of safety. To illustrate, a study published by Columbia University shows the decline in the rate of violent activities in New York City in the years between 1990 through 1998 after the police force was doubled. For these reasons, more patrolling is necessary in areas where there are increased illegal activities. CCTV cameras are like the eyes of policemen. They instill a sense of fear in people, who are going to perform a wrong activity, of getting caught and going to jail. These are used to reduce violence and catch lawbreakers by identifying their face and linking it to national database.
For example
Linking Words
, a study done at Harvard University shows that illegal acts decreased by 24-28 percent at train stations after cameras were installed.
Therefore
Linking Words
, surveillance footage helps a great deal in reducing crime. In conclusion, some states are worried by the growth in criminality. It is argued by most people that having more police force patrol is the best choice in decreasing wrongdoings. In my opinion,
although
Linking Words
 law enforcement agencies play a vital role in reducing crime, but,
however
Linking Words
, other measures
such
Linking Words
 as installing surveillance cameras on the streets is significant too.
Submitted by vicky_talib on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: