IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7

It is sometimes said that ‘travel broadens the mind’. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this?

#‘travel #mind’
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
There is a saying that a brain
that is
Linking Words
 open for learning will never remain the same.
Although
Linking Words
 it is quite acceptable for some people to think that it is only through travelling that we can gain new
insight
Use synonyms
, yet it is out of
question
Suggestion
the question
 for others. In my opinion, I strongly disagree that moving from one place to another expands the mind for new ideas, and in the following paragraphs I will give reasons to support
this
Linking Words
 statement. One reason why I disagree that travelling expands our horizon is because reading books provides a better perspective by taking the reader through a mind blowing journey,
thus
Linking Words
 providing the book reader with fresh
insight
Use synonyms
.
Although
Linking Words
 book reading can be done while sitting, yet the reader travels several miles and experience new culture and ways of life.
For example
Linking Words
, a recent survey by the University of Nigeria on the importance of reading shows that a person that reads books is more adept than a traveller. Another reason why I disagree that travelling changes people's horizon is that a person can broaden his or her mind by interacting with someone
that is
Linking Words
 knowledgeable on a subject matter. There is always an exchange of ideas while interacting with
such
Linking Words
 fellow.
For example
Linking Words
, I gain new
insight
Use synonyms
 when talking with someone
that is
Linking Words
 well vested in a subject, and
this
Linking Words
 helps broaden my horizon. To sum up, while some people might conclude that it is only through travelling we could develop new
insight
Use synonyms
, which is quite understandable. In my opinion, I strongly disagree with that statement because one can develop new
insight
Use synonyms
 through reading and interacting with a knowledgeable person.
Submitted by aiyeetangabriel on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: