Some people have benefited from modern communications technology, but some other people have not benefited from; to what extend do you agree or disagree.

#people #communications #technology

It is undoubtedly that newly-invented technologies play a crucial role in society as a whole. While I agree that online networks bring

negatively

Suggestion

negative

impact to people, I

also

believe that the

important

Suggestion

importance

of e-communication is too obvious to be ignored in modern life. On the one hand, up-to-date technologies have its own disadvantage to

people lifestyle

Suggestion

a person's lifestyle

person's lifestyle

First

of all,

this

plural of "this"

these

tools lead to the dearth of social connection and decreased human interaction. It means that, as individuals have a tendency to spend a great of their time in using

internet

Suggestion

the internet

, it is tough for them to have frequent contact and communicate face-to-face with people in real life.

Therefore

this

lack of communication leads to people is vulnerable to be isolated.

Another

Suggestion

Other

drawbacks is that the possibility of people’ losing the concentration on their work.

For example

, people could be addicted to surf the web or shopping online, being indifferent to their responsibility and, thereby the quality of work decline.

On the other hand

, modern communication has a positive influence on society. One striking advantage is the newly-invented tools have revolutionized the way we communicate. Most of us have greatly benefited from e-mail or internet chat program

such

as Facebook or Twister. These incredibly useful technologies enable people to keep in touch with their loved ones in far

way

from a particular thing or place or position

away

places.

Moreover

this

modern technology helps individuals to enrich their knowledge.

For instance

, people can gain access to any information with the click of a mouse

instead

of spending a day long in a library. In conclusion,

although

I concur with the negative of up-to-date tools for the whole social, I would believe that the positive effects of the modern communication are far greater.

Mon Aug 19 2019

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

Summary
Restatement of thesis
Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

In conclusion
To conclude
To summarize
Finally
In a nutshell
In general

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11Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

282 words

6.50

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Some people have benefited from modern communications technology, but some other people have not benefited from; to what extend do you agree or disagree.

Include an introduction and conclusion

These days many parents want their children to study a second language such as English. Do you think it is important for younger children to study a new language? Do you think schools should teach every student in primary school a second language?

Some children spend hours everyday on their smartphones. What is this the case? Do you think this is a positive or a negative developmnet?

It is impossible to help all people in the world, so governments should only focus on people in their own countries. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

The natural resources such as oil, and fresh water are being consumed at an alarming rate. What problems does it cause? How can we solve these problems?