While it is sometimes thought that prison is the best place for criminals, others believe that there are better ways to deal with them. What is your opinion?

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?

Although

Linking Words

some individuals are of the opinion that offenders would be reprimanded in prisons, others think that more effective ways are available to correct them. In my opinion, I believe that involvement in

community

Use synonyms

service, and rehabilitation are better ways to deal with prisoners. On the one hand, supporters of the view that prisons are more appropriate believe so because of the presence of other criminals.

In other words

Linking Words

, learning from sanctions meted out to other offenders will serve as a deterrent towards committing other crimes.

For example

Linking Words

, an offender who witnesses the execution of a fellow inmate will learn to avoid crimes or violence if ever released from prison.

Furthermore

Linking Words

, they

also

Linking Words

believe that it serves as a means of protecting the society from these criminals.

This

Linking Words

means that victims will be less terrified when offenders are placed in prisons.

However

Linking Words

, I am of the opinion that more beneficial ways exist to aid correction of an offender.

Firstly

Linking Words

, many criminals can be subjected to

community

Use synonyms

service where they are made to contribute greatly to the development of a

community

Use synonyms

through activities

such

Linking Words

as cleaning, gardening, helping out in nursing homes etc.

As a result

Linking Words

, they are able to recognise their usefulness to the society.

In addition

Linking Words

, some can be sent to rehabilitation centres where they are made to learn and recognise the effects of crimes committed, and how to live a better life before re-integration into the society. In conclusion, I consider involvement in

community

Use synonyms

activities and rehabilitation better ways to deal with criminals.

Submitted by wandeadegeye on Tue Aug 20 2019

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

Summary
Restatement of thesis
Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

In conclusion
To conclude
To summarize
Finally
In a nutshell
In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

11
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

255 words

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 & Task 2 checks
Practice with essays, charts, and letters.
Personalized suggestions & mistake analysis
Spot every mistake and boost your score.
Topic ideas & vocabulary helpers
Expand your ideas and use the right words.
Progress tracking
Watch your writing improve with every practice.

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

5
band
In spite of the advances in medicine, many people around the world still die of easily preventable diseases. Why is this the case? What can be done about this problem?
Beyond doubt, although there have been a lot of progresses in the medical science, many people suffer from some illnesses which are avoidable. I will delve into the main reasons, and I will explain how people can avoid these questions.
4.5
band
In some places old people is valued, while in other cultures youth is considered more important. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.
In the modern world, the old labor is appreciated in some aspects of various circumstances, while the youth is assessed to be more essential in other places. From my point of view, the two statements not only play an important role in life but also vary gradually to have a better work-life balance.
5
band
Some people work for the same organisation all their working life. Others think that it is better to work for different organisations. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.
In the past few years, there has been an ongoing trend about choosing career pathways. Is it better to work in one organization for a long time? Some people claim that it could benefit one’s life quality. However, I believe that having a job in different companies might give life experiences.
<4
band
In the past, people ate local food in season, but nowadays, people can buy a variety of food from all over the world. Do the advantages of this development outweigh it disadvantages?
in the old days, society used to eat seasonal food usualy from the local, nowadays society can get to eat a lots of kinds of food not only from local, but also from far places, and yes the benifts is more than someone can imagen.
6.5
band
children who are brought up in families that do not have large amount of money are better prepared to deal with the problems of adult life than children brough up by wealthy parents. to what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?
kids who are raised by a non-wealthy family ready to face a mature life than kids with rich parents. I could not agree more with this statement. I believe kids who grow up with a small amount of money have a lot of experiences for the future.

While it is sometimes thought that prison is the best place for criminals, others believe that there are better ways to deal with them. What is your opinion?

Include an introduction and conclusion

In spite of the advances in medicine, many people around the world still die of easily preventable diseases. Why is this the case? What can be done about this problem?

In some places old people is valued, while in other cultures youth is considered more important. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Some people work for the same organisation all their working life. Others think that it is better to work for different organisations. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

In the past, people ate local food in season, but nowadays, people can buy a variety of food from all over the world. Do the advantages of this development outweigh it disadvantages?

children who are brought up in families that do not have large amount of money are better prepared to deal with the problems of adult life than children brough up by wealthy parents. to what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?