IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 6.5

Some students work while studying. This often results in lack of time for education and constantly feeling under pressure. What do you think are the causes of this? What solutions can you suggest?

#students #work #results #lack #time #education #pressure
Most of the students prefer a job with studies, It may lead to students to focus on work compared to studies.
This
 causes the students don’t use knowledge in work. By some factor It is possible to resolve these kind of issues. As per my opinion, Good study is important, but nowadays everything is expensive like
education
, their own needs, food. Sometimes students are not able to afford these needs because they start to do part time job. To come up with a solution I feel government should change the
education
 system. They should provide free studies up to higher secondary after that the basic fees of colleges should be free so every student learn up in college. The government should introduce free e-learning to every student. To continue, when the learning is free students will focus on studies. They won’t try to run for earning money. If still not fulfilled their need, they should start teaching at the same college, so with the studies sharing the knowledge helpful them to grow themselves.
This
 kind of part time job should introduce into the
education
 system. The authority should introduce scholarship for students who are excellent, good and average. The amount can vary as per the marks they earn. To conclude,
education
 is important to each and every person. If uses in a proper way with the help of government and students’ contributions than no students will start work early in the age. Once they will get good knowledge, jobs are easy to get.
Submitted by ankita.t18 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
What to do next:
Look at other essays: