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Towns with big and beautiful shopping centres attract a lot of people.

Therefore

, many municipal corporations spend a lot of money to construct many

such

centres

instead

of using the land for public parks and sports facilities. In

this

essay, I will discuss why l completely agree to the proposition of new towns having more parks and sports complexes for its citizens and less of shopping plazas. Easy and free access to parks and sport facilities encourage people to stay healthy and active.

Moreover

, they are used on a daily basis by the populace, whereas shopping centres are places people visit every once in a while and

hence

are not a necessity. A study by Harvard University has shown that population of towns with abundant playing fields and grounds is twenty percent more fit compared to the ones which lack

such

facilities.

Thus

, the government should develop more public parks and sports complexes.

Furthermore

, unlike the malls which only allow big brands to open stores; these community parks and sports facilities help generate more employment opportunities for the common people by supporting local business in and around them.

For example

, whenever I go for a run in the district park, I buy fresh juice from the food truck in the parking lot. I have

also

observed, that there are many other vendors

such

as vegetable and meat seller who put their kiosks in the same area.

This

reason

further

bolsters the fact that towns should invest more public parks and sports arenas than shopping centres. To conclude,

this

essay discussed that community parks and sporting arenas not only allow people to stay fit and active, but

also

, help them to earn their livelihood by promoting local businesses. While, shopping centres are used by people only once or twice a month and they support big brands.

Therefore

, in my opinion, new towns should be designed with more public parks and sporting arenas.

Wed Aug 28 2019

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Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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11
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 9.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

7.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

321 words

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bla lafdsgfgdvsaggasdgasdgasgasv safdsafsdfsa asfasdfs

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Over time, as children grow older, the relationship they have with their parents changes. In your opinion, what role should parents have in their adult children’s lives?

In the past people used to wear their traditional clothes depending on their culture. Nowadays the trend is changing and people wear different clothes. Is it a positive or negative development? How does it affect certain societies and people’s behaviour?

A lot of places in the word rely on tourism as a main source of income. Unfortunately, tourism can also be a source of problems if it is not managed correctly. Describe the advantages and disadvantages of tourism in the modern word. Do you think that benefits of tourism outweigh its drawbacks?

In recent years, there has been a rise in the use of performance-enhancing drugs in sports. What are the consequences of doping for athletes? What measures should be taken to combat this issue?

Organizing tours to promote places and communities is becoming more and more popularity. Is it positive or negative development for the local people and environment？