IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 7

Many people decide on a career path early in their lives and keep to it. This, they argue, leads to a more satisfying working life. To what extent do you agree with this view? What other things can people do in order to have a satisfying working life?

#people #career #path #lives #life
Most of the people get to decide their career goal in a tender age. Many believe that, advance decision making brings success and contentment. According to me, every person should get an opportunity to explore the available options before making a conclusion, regardless of the topic.
This
 essay will elaborate my view and, methods for a satisfying work life. As per an article in the Times of India, only 27% of the population are leading a happy work life and, immature verdict regarding their profession, is the reason behind
this
. Every person is uniquely talented but hardly any, pursue it as their calling.
For example
, few might excel in arts
such
 as dance, music, painting others in technology or in philosophy, but they end up working as an engineer or a doctor. Countless adults, commit suicide each day because of the dissatisfaction in their jobs.
Although
, they reap profits because of their work, they struggle every day to obtain pride from what they do. Juveniles, have to get a chance to know their passion, after being introduced to a plethora of available options, before choosing one. Extra curricula have to be included as part of the curriculum. Students excelling in certain areas, can receive special coaching, which helps them to excel
further
.
Moreover
, societal pressures to take up only the traditional career options should be declined. C.E.O of KFC started his entrepreneurial journey at the age of 60, proving that it is unnecessary to fix a path at a young age. In order to cherish multiple career options and to lead a pleasurable living, I conclude saying that, it is not mandatory for youth to finalize their future. Government and
also
 individuals should
also
 make an effort to grab the life they wish to live.
Submitted by choutasridevi2 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: