Completing university education is thought by some to be the best way to get a good job. On the other hand, other people think that getting experience and developing soft skills is more important. Discuss both sides and give your opinion.

There is an ongoing debate about whether graduating from university or enhancing the variety of skills in several
aspects
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by experiencing some activities is more important for younger generations to capture better job opportunities.
Hence
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, in
this
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essay, I will discuss these distinct viewpoints and explain why I believe that both of them should be integrated to some extent.
To begin
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with, getting some academic certifications,
such
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as bachelor, master and PhD, is significantly effective in proving students'
knowledge
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and expertise.
For instance
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, in Japan, the majority of businesses pay higher salaries for employees who have a master’s degree than those who have only a bachelor’s degree.
This
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is simply because it is believed that the greater degrees
people
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possess, the more applicable their
knowledge
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is.
Therefore
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, if students have at least something to prove that they completed
university
Correct pronoun usage
their university
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education, they will be able to differentiate themselves from others who just graduated from high school.
However
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, it is
also
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true that without any
knowledge
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regarding how they can leverage that expertise in daily work, the evaluation from their seniors will decline because the most important aspect in business areas is the effectiveness of their skills. Meanwhile, as some
people
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argue, experiences are essential for younger
people
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to obtain better jobs because experiencing several things in various
aspects
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is the most effective approach to knowing how
people
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can leverage their academic
knowledge
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.
For example
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, even if
people
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know the ways of data analysis and abstract calculation
,
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apply
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if they do not know how they can use them in real contexts, those skills will be meaningless because they cannot solve any problem in society.
In contrast
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, what companies practice making a profit is resolving societal problems, including inconvenience and inefficiency.
Thus
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, to make those educational learnings more effective and helpful in those contexts,
people
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need to practice applying them to pragmatic cases by participating in volunteers and internships. By doing so, they can bridge between academic
aspects
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and practical ones, and the evaluations from job interviewers will be greater,
as a result
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.
In other words
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, younger
people
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should focus not just on academic backgrounds but
also
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on how they can use their expertise in businesses. In conclusion,
while
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obtaining educational certifications and having various experiences have many benefits respectively, by integrating both
aspects
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and bridging them, the total advantage becomes greater.
For
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this
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reason, I consider that
people
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should not concentrate only on either option.

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coherence
Make sure each paragraph clearly relates to the main topic and develops your argument. You did this well but could improve clarity in some areas.
coherence
Your introduction clearly presents the topic and your opinion, and your conclusion summarizes your main points effectively.

Word Count

IELTS says that you should write a minimum of 250 words in writing task 2. If you go under word count you will lose marks in task response.

A very long essay will not give you a higher band score.

Aim for between 260 to 290 words in writing task 2. This will ensure a concise essay and will be realistic in terms of time management. You have only 40 minutes to write the essay and you need around 10 minutes of planning time, so you will not be able to write a long essay in 30 minutes.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • theoretical knowledge
  • specialized training
  • networking
  • baseline requirement
  • financial burden
  • hands-on experience
  • practical skills
  • soft skills
  • dynamic job market
  • entrepreneur
  • formal education
  • portfolio
  • hybrid approach
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