IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 8

Task 2 People live longer in some part of the world. What do you think is the reason of this? Is this a good thing or a bad thing?

#people #part #world #reason
It is true that life expectancy is higher in some parts of the world and lifestyle change is one major contributing factor. In my opinion, I think living longer is beneficial. Healthy living is the main reason people live longer. Activities
such
 as, exercise and meditation have been found to reduce the incidence of disease and infirmity; leading to a longer life.
For example
, Ekonam, the eldest man in my village, claimed that his secret for good
health
 is early morning jogging and yoga.
Also
, reduction of alcohol usage has been found to decrease cases of diabetes and obesity. In these countries, ethanol is substituted with herbs and natural drinks. These alternates have a positive impacts on liver and heart and
hence
, promote good
health
.
Furthermore
, food choices have
also
 been altered in these places to ensure improved life. As the saying goes "we are what we eat", so a healthy diet adopted, translated
to
Suggestion
into
 better
health
. I believe that people ageing longer is a good thing because it reduces the agony caused
as a result
 of untimely death and the elderly serve as role models.
Firstly
, the loss of loved ones or parent are never welcome and can lead to severe pains and heartache. These feelings could
also
 predispose to depression and numerous mental
health
 issues.
For instance
, when my aunt lost her husband, she was in gruesome pain she almost committed suicide.
In addition
, sudden demise can lead to loss of property. If a man suddenly dies without a will prepared, retrieving or claiming of ownership of properties might be difficult.
Also
, the aged serve as role models and a guide to the young ones. They share experiences and stories that can give hope and motivate despite difficulties faced during their time. In conclusion, implementing a behavioural change is the main proponent responsible for longevity in many countries and in my opinion, I am convinced that people living longer is a good development.
Submitted by odutayoolawale on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • longevity
  • lifespan
  • preventive medicine
  • chronic diseases
  • public health initiatives
  • sedentary lifestyle
  • nutrition
  • wellness
  • healthcare infrastructure
  • demographic shift
  • geriatrics
  • social security
  • sustainability
  • overpopulation
  • quality of life
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