“Without capital punishment (the death penalty) our lives are less secure and crimes of violence increase. Capital punishment is essential to control violence in society. To what extent do you agree or disagree?”

It is thought that our lives would be less safe and that
crime
rates would surge in the absence of the death sentence.
This
penalty,
therefore
, plays a vital role in deterring
crime
. I strongly disagree with
this
point of view. It
it
Correct your spelling
is
show examples
largely justifiable that the death penalty is an appropriate method to control
crime
. Advocates of
this
view argue that people would be less inclined to commit a serious
crime
if they
know
Wrong verb form
knew
show examples
they might be executed.
However
,
such
a
Remove the article
apply
show examples
thinking is flawed as scientists agree that
this
punishment has no deterrent
efect
Correct your spelling
effect
.
For instance
, Vietnam is one of the countries where
this
is applied, yet the murder rate in
this
country is still high.
According to
the GSO, there have been over 1,000 murder cases reported since
last
year.
This
number proves that homicides still occur even when killers know that they might be sentenced to death.
Therefore
,
this
is not a holistic approach to vicious
crime
. In lieu of capital punishment, I think that superior alternatives could be adopted. One could be that states could spend more on education and training.
This
would increase educational
level
Fix the agreement mistake
levels
show examples
and deter juvenile delinquency, as most murders happening around young people are because of a
crime
of passion. Another is to imprison serious criminals for life without parole. Not only would
this
be a more humane measure
,
Add the word(s)
, but
show examples
it
also
would
stops
Change the verb form
stop
show examples
them from
reofending
Correct your spelling
reoffending
. In conclusion,
while
we could prevent heinous
crime
Fix the agreement mistake
crimes
show examples
by applying capital punishment, I believe that there are superior alternatives to deter it
instead
of
this
heartless method.
Submitted by lamphan1409 on

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Structure your answers in logical paragraphs

The easiest way to score well on the IELTS Task 2 writing portion is to structure your writing in a solid essay format.

A strong argument essay structure can be split up into 4 paragraphs, each containing 4 sentences (except the conclusion paragraph, which only contains 3 sentences).

Stick to this essay structure:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

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